The Slow Burn: Part Two
by lovethebroken
Summary: With the fall of SHIELD, the Avengers face new threats that they never imagined. Marcy finally feels like she has found a place in this world of superheroes, but what happens when things start to change? Is it true that nothing good lasts forever? Spoilers: Goes through events of IM3/TDW/CAWS/Ultron- leading up to CACW
1. Chapter 1

**Part One can be found here:** s/8120509/1/The-Slow-Burn-Part-One

I recommend reading that work first (if you haven't followed before).

 **:::::**

 **The Slow Burn: Part Two**

 **A/N:**

T _his is set some time (maybe a year) after The Slow Burn: P1. I've tried to study the timeline of everything…and then toss my story in the mist of all that…I don't know. Whatevs… I'm making my own damn timeline._

 _So…right now- we are picking up in the middle/end of CATWS. You all know me…I march to the beat of my own drum, so yes, the story is AU…_ _very AU probably_ _. But still. Enjoy._

 **WARNING: LANGUAGE**

 **SPOILERS: CATWS/Ironman 3/Thor: Dark**

:::

I glanced at my watch once more and sighed heavily. I was already packed and ready to go. Stark's jet wasn't due to arrive until late tomorrow morning. _Only fourteen hours to go._ I looked down at the book that I was trying to read. I had been trying to read this biography for over a week. I just couldn't do it. It wasn't my thing. Steve had sent it to me with a note saying, 'It's worth every minute.'

I had to disagree. The history of Eisenhower wasn't really on my book club list, but I was reading it anyways or at least trying to. After he read books he would mail it to me if he thought it was amazing. I started to send him books as well. The last one I sent to him was a Jack Reacher novel. The last I heard (three days ago) was he couldn't put it down.

I snapped the book shut and reached over for my phone. No new texts from Clint. I hadn't heard from him in six days. He was on a mission in Germany and commutation was limited. I scrolled through my lists of texts _, 'How are you?', 'Where are you? Yea-yea I know you can't tell.', 'I mowed the lawn. I hated every minute.', 'Going to BACK to Manhattan to help Tony with some stuff for a while.', 'I miss you.', 'I wish you'd answer back.'_

The last text I sent was two days ago. I hadn't felt the need to send another in a while. We argued more…which was actually not surprising to us. Tensions had ran wild for a bit before he decided to take this mission. He said he needed a break from…all of this. I couldn't help but think that this wasn't what he imagined it would be with me. He didn't seem happy. He was always on his phone talking to someone in hushed tones. He would spend nights in a haze just staring off into nothing. I had asked Natasha and she just said, 'He's dealing with something. Just give him time.'

My computer beeped and I looked over at it. I felt the huge grin cover my face as I tossed the book and phone to the couch bounding over to the desk in the kitchen. I pressed the answer button and Steve's face came into view. He looked surprised momentarily, "Hey. I didn't know if you'd be home or not."

"Yea…until tomorrow. I'm going to be included in Stark's detail for a bit while he's doing some 'top secret' stuff."

He shook his head and snorted, "Top secret…"

"Sooo…how's things with you Captain Wonderful?"

I gave him the name after every time I asked how he was- he would just say, 'wonderful'. He laughed broadly and gave a shrug, "Mm…okay. Been busy with SHIELD's projects. A lot of days- I feel like a lap dog."

I sighed heavily, "Yea…I'm being sent to _bodyguard_ Stark. I mean, really? The man wears a freaking metal suit."

"I would say babysit." He smiled before bringing a coffee mug to his lips.

I snorted, "Yea…he's like that annoying fly that won't go away. I think he's been sticking his nose into areas that it should not be in. Fury seemed _stressed_ when he called me. More stressed than usually I suppose."

"Sounds like Tony. Sounds like Fury." He fell silent. He seemed to be slightly distracted. Just as I was about to say something he beat me to the punch, "Your hair looks nice."

I smiled warmly and ran my hand over the low ponytail that draped over my shoulder, "Banner came up with a way for me to keep my natural brown. He couldn't help my eyes though…blue shall be forever in my favor."

"I like blue...it's a good color on you." He smirked. "So...I made a new friend."

I smiled broadly, "Look at you…Mr. Social Butterfly. That's one friend in like…what...six months."

He laughed, "You tease me…but I take my friendships seriously."

I stuck out my tongue, "Well, continue…"

"His name is Sam…met him while jogging. Works at the VA Clinic down town. Real nice guy. I think you would like him. Has some pretty good insight since he was…is…a serviceman. Works with PTSD soldiers."

"I know a few guys that did that when they got out. Takes a very strong and grounded person."

"That he is." He reached for something and then placed it in the view of the camera. It was the book that I had sent him. "Send more of these."

He sat the book down and smiled as I gave a giggle, "See? Told you that you'd like something other than history."

"Speaking of that- you enjoying Eisenhower?" His gaze narrowed as if he were already anticipating the lie. I leaned back in the computer chair and crossed my arms.

"It's riveting. Can't put it down."

He nodded expectantly, "Send it back. I think I have one on Hoover somewhere."

He looked behind him at this bookshelf. I fought the urge to moan in annoyance, "I'm on page…42 or whatever. I'll finish it. You can even quiz me hotshot."

"You can count on it," he tossed back, a mischievous gleam in his eye.

After about forty minutes or so of banter and catching up on our ' _dailies_ ', he regrettably said he had to go. He mentioned something about a mission, but couldn't say anymore. I stared at the black screen for a few seconds after he disappeared and then shut the computer off. I looked down at my phone- Clint still hadn't responded or called. You think after a year and half together I would have gotten more than this…covert or not covert. He was a damn spy...I mean, really? Could he not send smoke signals or strange packages with scavenger hunts for clues? Guess that showed my desperate need for human contact.

I stood and stretched as I looked at the clock and yawned. Steve and I had talked for a little over an hour before he had to go. I enjoyed catching up with him. After the whole Crystal incident, we were all spread around SHIELD and Avengers pretty thin. No one had heard from Thor in a while. Steve didn't seem concerned. He had 9 Realms to protect and watch over. Plus he had commented on wanting to spend more time with Jane. Things had been tough from what he told me. After saving London or the world rather (again), he told his father that he wasn't going to take the thrown and came back to Earth. Immediately that made Jane feel responsible and bad for the whole thing. I was in the loop in everything despite being out here in Georgia. Nothing ever exciting happened here and I think that it why my place seems like a refuge to my team mates. I, more or less, considered my house a B&B for wayward and weary superheroes.

But yea, my friendship with Thor was a surprising one since we didn't really converse hardly at all at the beginning. When Thor did drop by though, he would stay for days. He'd preferred this place to the tower as did I honestly. Surprisingly enough, Thor was great at fishing. Now Tony, well, he was harder to read, but he had been that way since the whole Mandarin incident. Pepper mentioned through a few emails that he was having some PTSD from all of the missions and battles we had been through. I'd be worried about him if he didn't in truth.

I only spoke to Natasha when I absolutely needed to. She and I were on odd ground considering where we stood with Clint. She was the confidant and I was the…girlfriend? I think I could claim that status. Then only adding insult to injury, she was Steve's partner.

Shutting off the lights, I headed up stairs. Morning would come soon enough and I needed my beauty rest if I was to be living at Stark or _Avenger_ tower as he had recently renamed it. He was hell bent on keeping the dream of the Avengers alive. I wasn't completely sure if SHIELD would let it continue. We had run of glory for a short time, but I had the feeling that we were liked better separately than together. My phone buzzed and I felt a rush of excitement move through me as I glanced down at my phone expecting Clint.

 **Steve: It was great talking to you again. We should video chat more often. Tell Clint hello when he calls.**

I felt a small, but brief disappointment. I smirked as I replied back.

 **Marcy: Couldn't agree more. Tell Betsy I miss her. Night Captain Wonderful.**

Betsy was what I had been calling his shield for months now. It was only appropriate since Betsy Ross sewed the first flag and well, the shield was the first. Well, it made sense at the time, but that was under the influence of the Asguardian mead that Thor had brought for Tony's birthday celebration. I wish I still had the flask that Thor had given me before he left. It was my own personal stash until Steve helped me finish it off about a month ago.

 **Steve: I think Betsy misses you too. Night Sparky.**

I stared at my phone for a second longer wishing I was there to help with his mission. A real mission, not going on some babysitting adventure. I wanted to get my mind off of things. I was trying to 'court war' as Thor called it, but I wanted to feel more useful than what I was right now. I trudged up the stairs and to my room. I opened my phone again and sent a quick message to my mom to take care of the house while I was gone. Then one to my sister about Tyler's amazing soccer play that she sent me a video of.

Just a normal life. That is what I had dreamt of…right? Well, now I have it for sure.

:::

The flight was very uneventful if you didn't include the pilot trying to make small talk. I shifted the duffel bag on my shoulder as he continued to babble on about his flying career with Stark. I glanced at him wishing he would just…hush. Just two minutes of silence. This guy did not breathe. I smiled slightly at him and then Pepper spoke up loudly catching our attention, "Marcy!"

 _Thank god._

"Pepper! How wonderful to see you."

She smiled knowingly, "Stan is one of the best pilots we have. Hopefully he treated you well?"

I faltered for a second as Stan took my duffel from me, "The best!"

"Splendid. Tony is looking forward to seeing you," she took my arm and ushered me to her car. She was obviously my shofar today. I waved at Stan and said thanks before I slid into the exotic sports car. She grinned as she shut her door, "Stan means well."

"He seemed nice."

"How's Clint?"

I shrugged as she turned down a private road, "I'm guessing he's still alive."

She frowned at that, "You two aren't talking?"

"He's...indisposed at the moment. I guess that comes with the territory of the job." I was still hoping that Clint would show some sign…some proof that he just wasn't a figment of my imagination. Another week and I would be calling Fury himself in order to get a status on Clint. My phone beeped and I pulled it from the pocket of my jeans.

 **Steve: Mission was…not what I thought. Fury is a liar. If that isn't a surprise. I'm starting to wonder if Nat is of the same blood.**

I frowned at the message. Steve wasn't always so negative. Something horrible must have happened on the mission he had with Natasha. I wouldn't necessarily say that Natasha was a team player, but I wouldn't say she wasn't one either. She usually played for her own team. I shook my head in a small disagreement with myself. I shouldn't be so rude about her. She's saved my life before or helped me out in a few ways. Pepper was glancing at me.

"Clint?"

I gave a tiny shake of my head, "Steve."

Pepper raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow at that, "You both text quite often?"

 **Marcy: I just landed in New York. Skype tonight?**

"Yea," I answered distractedly. It didn't take long for his reply.

 **Steve: Yes, may be late. Have to go. Meeting.**

Pepper gave a thoughtful 'hmm' and I looked at her then, "What?"

She was trying not to smile, "And how is the dear Captain?"

I looked back out the window, trying not to worry about Steve's cryptic text, "He's great."

 **:::**

Steve never showed up to our _'Skype Date'_. I even had Jarvis check the internet to make sure everything was working. I checked my phone, checked email…then what really worried me…I called him.

No answer.

Spending half the night tossing and turning, waking up constantly to check my phone and computer- I had about enough. At 10 or so, I burst through the doors of Tony's lab. He was watching something intently. "Have you spoken with Steve? I can't get a hold of him. I'm starting to get worried." He didn't answer. I sighed and rolled my eyes as I rounded the wall. "Hey…Tony. What are-?"

"Nick Fury's dead."

He handed me the tablet that had a 'formal email' citing the death notice of Director Nick Fury. I looked up and squinted at the footage from cameras in the downtown area of DC. A man dressed in black from head to toe, a metal arm to boot. "I...I…he's…he's dead. This is the footage?"

"No, no…it's the footage of this guy attacking him. The _only_ footage that was _extremely_ hard to find. You have no idea how many nooks and crannies I had to comb through to find that." He shook his head as he walked back to his desk and started shoving papers around. "Fury was shot in Steve's apartment. He died in surgery."

I swung around at that, "What?"

He was already on the phone with someone. I couldn't understand the words he was speaking. I think shock may have been setting in. I grabbed my phone and tossed the tablet onto the table. Steve's number was on speed dial. _Pick up. Pick up. Pick up._

"Marcy, are you alright?" He sounded winded and for Steve to sound winded…I felt myself swallow tightly at that.

Relief flooded through me nonetheless, "Am I alright? What the hell are you talking about? Am I ok? Fury was shot…he's dead. He was shot in your apartment. What's going on Steve?"

"I know…I know. I can't talk right now." I could hear Natasha in the background. "Stay with Tony. Stay safe. Don't come here. I'll be in touch soon."

"Steve…" I all but pleaded.

"I swear- I swear I will contact you soon." He hung up. I tried to swallow but couldn't. What was going on? Tony was watching his phone intently. This was bad, wasn't it?

"Jarvis- shut down all communication in and out with SHIELD Headquarters. Lock down- no one in or out. Tell Pepper once she gets to LA to stay there until further notice."

"Tony…"

"Also, tell Bruce to be on alert."

 _"Yes Sir,"_ Jarvis replied calmly.

"Tony," he was moving around the lab at an alarming speed. He was grabbing papers and throwing them in an empty box labeled, 'SHIELD INFINITY'. I hadn't seen him this worked up in a while. "Tony, you need to stop. Okay, _breathe_. Take a moment right here- right _now_. You need to explain to me what it is that you've found out."

He turned and looked at me… _really_ looked at me. It was like he was just noticing I was here. His appearance looked disheveled. He shook his head and clicked his tongue, "I've been noticing…some _things_. Natasha asked me… _Fury_ asked me to do some inside research."

"Fury asked you?" That part was hard to fathom.

He sat down heavily in his chair and I leaned on the desk behind me, "I was hired to help build these ships…they wanted my input and from then on things got…weird. Fury…he thought there was a mole and he knew that I was pretty much the one who could find it undetected. I can't believe I missed it this whole time."

"Missed what?" I asked just milliseconds before he stood up and threw his phone against the wall. A whole slew of profanities came out. He shook his head, "Damnit! Fucking hell…I should have known. Fuck. Fuck! It's all been one damn thing after another. It was right there. Right there!"

I approached him slowly. My fingers tingled at the thought of a fight. I clenched my fist tightly. He was leaning on the counter in front of him, his hair sticking up on one side. I knew the issues he was having with his PTSD- he was already on the edge pretty much all the time.

"What did you miss Tony?"

"Hydra." He swallowed hard as his wild brown eyes looked up at mine. He looked scared for a split second, "Hydra is SHIELD."

 ** _:::_**

 _DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING OF MARVEL AND ITS AMAZING LITTLE UNIVERSE._

 _ORIGINAL CHARACTERS BELONG TO ME._


	2. Chapter 2

I blinked, "That's why Fury sent me to watch you. He wanted to keep us paired up…in case…"

My eyes and mind drifted off as Clint came to mind. He was alone. I pulled my phone out and started a message to Clint. Tony stood straighter, "In case of what?"

 **Marcy: NOT SAFE. ABORT. SHIELD COMPROMISED.**

That was all I could type before the sirens blared loudly overhead. Tony punched a few clear buttons on a wall of glass. Security footage showed agents in black coming through the back doors of the tower. I pressed send on my phone and shoved it in my back pocket. "The Quinjet?"

"Banner has it."

"Awesome," I said flatly.

"Jarvis stall them!" Tony's fingers were flying quickly around the glass wall. I worked on my own section of the glass going over the monitors that were set up in the tower. He had a camera everywhere. That's one thing I did like about Tony. He was a major conspiracy theorist with security issues. I watched the screen trying to count the men as they were spreading throughout the building, "Four…five….six….seven….maybe twenty-five. I may have counted a few extra."

"Oh…that _all_?" He scoffed as he held out his hand waiting on his suit. I pulled my hair into a tight ponytail before moving tables to turn over. We were out in the open technically so these heavy, thick metal tables would prove best for cover fire. One thing I could guarantee- it was going to be a mess.

Papers, beakers, and electronics scattered to the ground in shards and pieces. Tony let out a few choice curses as he watched his experiments shatter. I gave a shrug and sheepish smile, "Don't mind, do you?"

" _Sir- the entire suit is not ready for battle. We are still in prototype phase with the weaponry."_

The look was annoyed but he shook his head none the less, "You'll be helping clean those up. Jarvis, what part is?"

"Right…assuming we are alive when this is all over." I heard shouts coming from behind the door and then complete silence before the gunfire was heard in the stairwell. "Guns?"

"Top drawer. Cabinet on your left."

" _The right glove and also, both fitted boots, sir."_

Tony sighed heavily, "I'll take it. Give me what you got. Let's show 'em the ABC's."

I shoved a clip in my back pocket and pulled a casing into the chamber. My knife was already in my boot. I never left home without it. I gripped the gun tight with one hand. Tony was a sight hiding behind the concrete wall with one glove and two metal boots on. "ABC's?"

"My defense soldiers. Still in prototype mode. Probably won't last long."

The gunfire seemed to pick up dramatically then. The door to the stairwell blew off and bullets ruptured through the room. The invisible glass walls shattered and instantly tiny sharp flecks showered us. Tony was shooting pulses from his gloved hand. I leaned around the table and fired a couple of shots. I slid an extra gun over to Tony and he looked at me questioningly, "Use both hands you doof."

"I think I liked it better when you were the shy Marcy."

I fired a few shots before I threw a fireball at them, "Yea…well I liked it better when everyone wasn't trying to kill me every other week."

"At least it's every other week," he mumbled faintly. I shoved the gun into the back of my jeans and hurled another fireball at them. Coiling my hands together as the next fireball grew bigger, I assessed the area. We had plenty of cover but space was small. Fighting in tight places was not ideal especially when your opponent come equipped with MP5's. I shoved the fireball out in front of me about two foot and it exploded into thousands of golf ball sized fireballs. I threw my hands up above me and back toward my head. The thousands of fireballs glowed a beautiful cerulean blue, the light in the workspace was brilliant as they quickly dispatched themselves into the assault behind us.

I turned to see Stark leaping over the table he was using for cover and begin hand to hand. ' _Idiot_.' He didn't have any of his armor and still he felt invincible. I stood up suddenly knowing I'd have to cover him in a flash. An MP5 weapon disbursed hundreds of rounds per minute. Surely he was aware of this given his background with weaponry. I hurled two fireballs out for a distraction as I ran toward the door that was producing these armored men little by a lot. Dropping on to my knees I slid about four feet, my knees slicing through the shells and blood that was coating the slick concrete flooring. Ripping out my gun, I fired two quick shots into the 'guards' by the door. I had fleeting thought that Natasha would be proud. My mind ridiculed me at that moment for losing focus.

Shifting my attention back to Tony, who was working on three men in black fatigues that were about ten feet away, he was holding his own extremely well considering his lack of uniform. I leaned around the shattered door frame only to be met with a round of gunfire and a white hot searing pain in my shoulder, "Shit."

I jerked away and quickly threw a fireball into the stairwell- thinking heavily on it…it exploded like a bomb. "Marcy!"

I shot a glance in Tony's direction just in time to see a large brute of a man closing in fast with a Rambo looking knife in his hand. His brown eyes looked murderous and I didn't doubt their intent. I threw a flash fireball into his face before I deflected the knife that came just centimeters from my face. The man's arm hit the wall where I very _sadly_ tried to hold it. His punch found itself planted firmly on the right side of my face then stars erupted from my vision. _'Bastard.'_ His 'roid rage was a bit much for me to over power. But that didn't matter…size had nothing to do with a fight. I thrust the heel of my palm up into his nose, he cried out just as I threw the heel of my right palm against his left ear, hard. He stumbled slightly still trying to use the King Kong of a knife. _'Really?_ ' He slashed out and it caught my shoulder in a deep slice. Crying out in a rage, I caught his arm and gave a slight twist as I brought the elbow down over my shoulder. He screamed and the knife clattered to the ground. My arms were on fire from my wounds, but I gritted my teeth hard as I forced my elbow up behind me into the man's chin. He fell back to wall. Another man come toward me, gun in hand. _'Oh no. This was it.'_

The man's eyes widened along with the sound of a pulse from Tony's palm. I sighed in relief as the man fell down on his knees and then flat onto his face with a distinct crunch. My breath that was caught in my throat as relief flooded my chest. The footsteps, however, that echoed up the stairwell plunged me back into reality. I bent over to grab the knife. Tony sent a pulse down the stairwell and retreated to the wall in front of me. He gave me a once over, "Damn."

"That bad?" I breathed heavily. It sure felt bad. Tingles trickled up and down my right arm and my left, ugh, the gash where the blade had sliced through me burned painfully. My eyes flickered down to the man who was getting to his feet…slowly. I swallowed dryly. Tony sent another pulse down and he chuckled.

"That good actually. Reminding me of a feisty red head I know."

The man had his sights set on an abandoned MP5. I stepped hard on the man's elbow he was dragging, not surprised to see it was rendered useless. He cried out in pain- couldn't say I was sorry for that pain honestly. I shook my head realizing the comment Tony had just made, "Please don't compare me to Nat."

Pulling up on the man's thick blonde hair I whispered, "Thanks for ruining my new jacket asshole."

"Bitc…" his words died out in a gurgle. I turned to see Tony giving me an eye of disapproval. Too much? No one questioned Natasha's methods, but when it came to me it was as if I had grown two heads, bat like devil wings, and a forked tail.

I settled beside him on the wall and tossed the knife away from us. I wasn't worried about the man getting up now. He smirked a bit and then it fell, "I was actually going to say Pepper."

"What?"

"I'll explain later. Can you throw another firebomb down there?" I nodded rubbing my hands on my jeans before I conjoined my hands making a large ball. I could do one better than that. I could make two of them inside each other. I had been practicing this new defense for a while now, the kicker, the ball was only the size of a basketball thought. Plus another pesky issue…it left me very weak afterwards. Tony shot two more pulses and laid down heavy gunfire at the men who were trying to resume with their mission. "Jarvis, how many more?"

" _Thirteen, sir."_

Holy shiznit…we actually and surprisingly had killed a lot of them. Swallowing, I ground out, "Shoot a pulse down there and then get out of my way quickly. We will need to take cover after a throw it."

He gave a nod of affirmation, "Say when."

The ball was as a big as a beach ball now. With my vision blurring slightly I made the ball bigger. The ball inside of itself was twisting the opposite direction. I need to focus my direction of the blast or I'd kill us all. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Tony take a double glance at me. Wisps of hair were blowing out of my ponytail. I gave a terse nod, "Go."

Just like I told him- Tony shot a pulse down the stairwell and quickly pivoted around me and the vast indigo fireball, my hands shook as I tried to contain the energy. I shoved it down to the bottom of the stairs. My knees collapsed as Tony pulled me away from the door. It hadn't exploded yet- I could hold the control with my mind…not for long though. It was just long enough for Tony to position us behind the metal table.

"When…?" He asked quickly.

BOOM

The room shook, wind forced its way out of the stairwell and blew out the outer windows of the tower. Chunks of concrete, papers, wiring, beakers, and various debris rained down upon us. Tony brought his body over mine and tried hard to cover our heads with his one robotic hand. Alarms started to sound and Tony grunted heavily as he pushed himself to his feet. I watched him turn in a complete 180 as he surveyed the damage. "Holy ' _fuck'_ me…"

I stood on two shaky legs, I could feel it, my world starting to slip away. I tried to speak Tony's name- I needed to get his attention. I was about to be on the floor, passed out, unaware of everything. I hoped the threat was over. "T-T-Tony…"

He turned, his face etched in worry- he blurred and then he was gone.

I was mostly positive that the best dreams I had were when I was in a 'coma' due to work related events. I was standing on a sunny beach, beautiful turquoise colored water, waves lapping at my feet and I was free. Relaxed and carefree…

The wind felt luscious against my skin like a cool blanket on a hot day, the air smelled lightly of lilies and coconut butter. It was everything that a vacation should be. There wasn't a world to save or a war to fight. No cuts, bruises or scrapes…just perfection in itself.

Warm arms wrapped around me and I sighed into them. A day old beard brushing against my neck making me moan. Lips found the sensitive patch of skin behind my ear before they move to the lobe to suck gently. Large rough hands left trails across my stomach just barely missing the bottom of my breasts. Pushing back into him I could feel the bulge pressing hard against my backside. I leaned further back giving an extra nudge. He gave a throaty growl, "Marcy."

My eyes flashed open. White walls. I was surrounded by white walls and a constant beeping save for the elevated heart rate. I groaned as I moved my right arm trying to assess the damage. It hurt like hell. I glanced around the room- it wasn't a hospital room like I had expected…I was still in Avenger Tower. I sighed back into the bed.

"Marcy?"

Shifting my eyes over to Banner, I let a smile grace my lips, "Hey…is everything ok?"

"I should be asking you that. You've been out for almost a day." He looked worried then. I sat up quickly and let out a hiss. My whole body pulsed with hot pain. I was starting to rethink this firebomb weapon of mine.

"I need…I need to go. Steve…he's- he's in trouble." I started to swing my legs over the bed and he stopped me.

"You can't help him. He's…he's actually in a hospital in DC."

"What?!"

Tony walked in at that moment, "Thank god. I thought I was going to have to explain to everyone how you went out with a bang."

A wry smile sat proudly on his lips. I snorted, "Laugh all you want. I saved you."

"Sure ya did Hot Sauce," he cackled as he stepped forward with a tablet that looked to be the size of a thirteen inch tv. He sighed heavily, "Cap's in a hospital in DC. Seems that he found his old buddy Bucky."

My eyes grew, "Bucky…" The scene played out from the news feed, a tall man deck in black with a metal arm was fighting Steve in a very elaborate hand to hand combat. The footage went to large aircraft carriers crashing into the Potomac River. "Oh my god…"

My breath caught in my throat. Tony drew in a breath, "He's okay. Really bad shape when he was brought in, but he's doing well."

"I need to go see him."

"He's still not awake just yet. There's no rush Marcy…he's going to be physically fine," Bruce said assuredly.

I ran a shaking hand through my hair, "What about the others? Nat? Clint? Have you seen Thor?"

"This happened fairly fast…Thor wasn't alerted in time. Nat- she was with him. She's okay though, she's fine." Bruce seemed relieved at his own announcement. "As for Clint…we-we haven't heard from him."

I looked down and felt tears spring to my eyes, swallowing hard I cleared my throat, "I'm good. Just get me my bag from my room- I'll change and I'll be on the next flight to DC."

Bruce shot Tony a sideways glance. Tony nodded, his face looking ashen. I'm sure he wasn't having an easy time with his PTSD. We fought our asses off and destroyed half of his lab not too long ago, "I'll have someone fly you."

Bruce sighed heavily, "Keep your head down. Lots of people are looking to crucify whoever is attached to the whole SHIELD dishevelment."

"I'll be on my best stealthy behavior."

 **DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything- except original characters that I have created.**

 **Also, no betas were used in the typing of this chapter…**


	3. Chapter 3

::::

Natasha was standing outside Steve's room when I arrived on his floor. Her face was blank, arms crossed, and her clothes were actually all business no pleasure. I found this odd really. She only wore a getup like this if she were undercover. But here she was, playing doorman to Steve's room. She looked up when the guards suddenly stood taller. She studied me for a long moment before we were within a foot of one another.

"I heard about the tower. Glad you two are okay."

I nodded and shifted my bag. My shoulders and neck were still sore. Not to mention the gunshot wound I had suffered was killing me right now. If I had known that I was going to get my ass half kicked, I would have packed lighter. "Yea…well, doesn't compare really."

I shifted my gaze to the door. Behind the half closed blinds, I could see Steve laying on a bed. She sighed and her eyebrow curved higher in agreement I assume, "He's been awake for better part of the day. He's healing nicely. Some bones had to be reset because of his enhanced healing ability. Should be out of here by tomorrow or so."

I nodded feeling a small sense of relief wash over me. It was the first good news I had heard, "Wish I could have been there to help."

"We all have a part to play Marcy. It's understandable."

I looked back at the door once again and she smirked, "Go ahead."

Before I could move she spoke again in a hushed tone, "Clint?"

I opened my mouth and I couldn't make my voice work. I didn't want to admit defeat to this red headed bomb shell of a woman whom I knew could find Clint _better_ and _faster_ than I ever could. I swallowed hard and felt my eyes burn for a brief moment. I shook my head and felt the tightness in my throat, "No communication."

She studied my eyes for a long second before giving a swift and firm nod, "I'll find him."

Then she was off. That hurt though, more than I thought it would. I sniffed in her wake and cleared my throat trying to rid the puddle of tears caused from my disappointment. Did she know? Did she and Clint discuss our problems? I glanced back in Steve's direction as a realization hit me. I had discussed our problems with Steve- did I have a right to be angry even if he had said something to Natasha? No. But life with Clint though…was a rocky road. I knew what I was getting myself into.

I knocked softly before pushing the door open. A man sat to the left of him reading a book. He looked up, eyes skeptical, but instantly I was drawn to Steve's face. He gave a tiny smile, "Thought I told you to stay put."

I shrugged before thinking and winced as I set my bag down on the floor, "I don't follow orders very well Captain."

"I'm very well aware Sergeant." He glanced over at the man, "This is Marcy."

His eyes lit with recognition and he stood holding his out, "Sam Wilson, it's a pleasure. Steve has told me a lot about you. Didn't mention how beautiful you were though."

Feeling the blush rise in my cheeks and knowing that right now I looked like I had been in MMA fight- I moved on with the introduction with a tiny smile, "Marcy James."

I turned my attention back to Steve who was watching me closely. He was reading me and he knew me well. I swallowed the lump in my throat. After choking back the tears outside the door, I was now one step closer to losing it in front of Steve and this stranger. I opened my mouth to speak, but closed it again when I felt the tears prick the edges of my eyes. He must have noticed, "Hey Sam, Marcy has had a long morning. Maybe you could-"

Sam nodded with a half smirk, "I can take a hint. How do you like your burger Marcy?"

"Cooked with everything," I said with a watery smile trying not to meet his eyes. Sam gave a bit of a chuckle before heading out the door. It clicked softly and the room seemed heavier. Sam was a light for Steve, clearly. Their friendship was something that Steve needed. I melted into the chair next to the bed.

"Are you okay?"

I sat for a moment thinking on that. Between all of the close calls, missing Clint, and feeling like a punching bag…no. I didn't feel okay. I nodded as I scooted the chair closer, "I'm fine- how are you? You had a lot of injuries. You are the one I'm concerned about."

He scoffed, "Don't make light of the situation Marc…Tony told me everything that happened. Everything you did."

I rolled my eyes and leaned away from him, "Did he tell you that I saved our lives? Cause I did."

"He said you took an unnecessary risk-"

"Unnecessary?" I raised my voice, "You were shot three times Steven and almost drown. If anything was unnecessary, it was your decision not to use force to bring him in using all force _necessary_."

He looked angry for a moment before it dissipated, "I'm okay."

I shook my head and wiped tears away, "Yea. World's toughest soldier."

He tried to sit up and winced before reaching out and grabbing the armrest of the chair. He pulled bringing the chair flush with bed, "I'm okay Marcy. This was different."

"I can't do this anymore." I wiped away more tears feeling the ache in my chest. The ache of loss and pain and loneliness all hit me at once. The tears flowed freely in front of him. Steve was my best friend I'd say and the comfort I felt right now…the pity coming from his eyes. I just couldn't take it. "I can't lose anyone else."

He reached for my hand and I let his engulf it. The warmth made me shiver. He spoke softly, "You don't know Clint's situation. He's extremely resourceful Marcy. This is what he does the best. He can hide in plain sight and no one would find him."

 _Except Natasha_ , I thought bitterly. He squeezed my hand again bringing my thoughts away Natasha and Clint undercover somewhere in secret. I licked my lips and cleared my throat as I sniffed, "I-I, um…" I closed my eyes and gave my mind a mental shake before continuing _. Tell him, you don't have to carry this alone, you know?_ "I think he's seeing someone on the side."

His hand tensed, "How do you know?"

"Just my gut."

"He'd be crazy."

"She's probably a normal, life is pie Betty Crocker homemaker that doesn't shoot fire from her fingertips or make bombs from the palms of her hands." I starred at the swirls on the hospital blanket, "Probably every man's wet dream."

There was a quick knock and Sam burst through the door holdings bags of food that made my stomach growl to life. Not realizing how hungry I had been, I greedily took the food and bottle of water. Steve laughed at something that Sam said.

Steve gave me a quick nod of reassurance and I returned it with a tiny smile. Sam's laugh drifted through the room again at something Steve said. I didn't hear, but I laughed in response. Feeling my mood lift ever so slightly it fluttered into my mind, that this right now, is maybe what I need. _Maybe._

:::::::

"I'm saying- come stay with me for a while."

Steve was kneeling on the floor packing books into boxes. His apartment was in a horrible state and virtually unlivable. I kept glancing at the bloodstain on the floor. Steve shrugged again and gave a sigh, "Do you not think it would be best to take Tony up on his offer though? I mean, the whole team staying together is what's best."

"I've spoken with Thor and he's with Jane, Natasha is…wherever she goes, Clint is MIA….Bruce and Tony have a bromance going on…who's left? Hm? You and me bub. We gotta stick this out together."

"You just don't wanna mow your yard alone."

I let out a laugh and he grinned as I tossed a book at him. "The one time that I mentioned I hate mowing and now that's all you can dwell on." He caught it with a snap of his wrist and packed it away, "I'm just saying that you need a vacation and I have a place with plenty room."

"I could finally get some of my books back," he mumbled trying to fain as little interest as possible.

"Yea…I need some roof work done too."

"This vacation is sounding more appealing by the second," he said standing up. He nudged me on the way to the door. After he placed the boxes on top of the others, he turned, hands on hips, serious look on his face, "Look. I'll stay with you on one condition."

I scrunched my eyebrows in confusion. I crossed my arms, slightly defensive, I thought it was a good plan, "Okay…"

"I want the furthest room from yours." His face was stone hard.

"Okay…if you-"

He continued with an abrupt bright white smile, "You snore too dang loud."

My eyes widened at that and tossed another book at him. Sam stepped through the door, "So you two are just gonna talk while I load boxes into the truck…freakin' superheroes. Always taking the easy way out."

I rolled my eyes and grabbed a box, "Anyone ever tell you that you talk too much?"

Heading down the stairs, I left the men to bicker over boxes. The truck was being taken care of by some of Tony's men. He told Steve no matter where he went that the truck was sure to follow. Trust worthy Tony…yep. My phone buzzed just as I shoved the box onto the lift that was attached to the back of the truck. Pulling it out, I honestly expected Pepper. She had been texting me saying that she wanted me to stop by on the way back through and have dinner, but I hadn't yet said yes to her.

" **I'm okay. Staying under the radar at a safe house for a while. Too much information out in the open."**

I froze. It was Clint. He was okay. Natasha found him. She…she found him for me. My fingers shook as I typed back a message. **"Where are you? Can I see you?"**

Within seconds the single word had popped up and I felt my chest tighten, **"No."**

I couldn't breathe for a second as the word pumped through my veins and made my heart ache. I had waited this entire time for communication from him. My fingertips flew over the screen, **"I've missed you. I've been so worried Clint. Please come home soon. I love you."**

Seconds ticked by and I could hear Steve and Sam's boisterous laughing echoing in the stairway of his building. I swallowed waiting for an answer. Just as the guys hit the sidewalk, I felt my stomach drop and my chest tightened uncomfortably. Clint's words seemed bright across the screen as they appeared. My breathing began to increase. I grabbed my chest and I couldn't take a deep breath. I was going to suffocate here on the sidewalk. Steve's eyes appeared in front of me saying my name over and over.

"She's having a panic attack man," Sam announced beside him. Steve was in my cloudy line of vision. I shoved the phoned at him. "Give her some space."

"Marcy. Just breathe okay. In and out. Breathe." I pressed the phone to his chest and shook my head. His face was a mass of confusion and he gripped the phone blindly as I pushed away from him. "What's going on Marcy? Say something."

I headed down the street as I gulped for air. Steve called after me again, "Marcy!"

"Give her a bit man," Sam said seriously. It was the last thing I heard before I rounded the corner.

 _We were laying in the hammock under two large oak trees in the back yard. The sky twinkling bright with stars, the moon was high and large, and it was perfect. There was a breeze blowing with a hint of rain on the tail end. I snuggled closer and he responded by rubbing my shoulder. He was especially quiet tonight. He sighed, but it wasn't the kind of sigh that was content…it was something different. It held a weight._

" _I'm leaving for a while," he whispered._

 _I glanced at him and then back at the stars, "When will you be back?"_

 _His answer took longer than necessary. I sat up slightly and looked at him. He looked away, his blue eyes glinting in the moonlight. He was sad or was that something else I saw in them. Usually he wasn't this remorseful about going on a mission. It was our jobs. "I have some personal business to take care of and then I have a mission assigned from SHIELD."_

" _What kind of personal business? Is everything okay?"_

 _I heard him swallow and his gaze fell onto me. He looked pained, "If you did something that you…you knew was wrong, but you didn't regret it…would you still tell me?"_

" _What?" I searched his eyes for a hint...something. He shifted away from me and wrung his hands. What on earth was going on?_

 _He shook his head, "Nothing. Just never mind."_

" _No, no, no. You don't get to say something like that then just say 'never mind' like it didn't happen. What's going on?"_

 _He looked away, "I need to pack."_

 _He pulled away from my grasp and headed for the back porch, "Clint."_

 _He stopped abruptly, but didn't turn. I was still on the hammock and strangely, I didn't feel the need…the want to go after him. "You need to tell me."_

 _He turned his head slightly in my direction, but he shook his head in refusal. He continued walking away from me, "I leave in a few hours. I need to get packed."_

It's around 9pm when I step up to Steve's apartment door. It's cracked and light is streaming into the foyer. The moving truck is gone and headed to wherever…probably not my place. After my episode hours ago Steve will undoubtedly have changed his mind about living with a basket case. I can still see the words from Clint's text in my mind, clear and to the point. The thing that I had feared since he left me sitting in that hammock with a bright moon caressing his silhouette as he walked away from me- had just happened. If I had just read the signs. Why couldn't I read the signs?

"You just gonna stand there all night?"

His soft voice doesn't startle me, but does bring me back. I rub my clammy hands on my jeans before I slowly push the door open. I can see him sitting at the table as I shut the door and step out from the foyer. The table and two chairs were the only furniture still left in the apartment.

"Not taking the table?"

He looks over his shoulder and gives a vague shrug, "I like yours better."

That eased my aching heart…a little. I gave a small sigh of relief as I moved closer to the table. There were two sandwiches and two bottles of water in the center…along with my dreaded phone. He closed his book as I settled in the chair next to him. He tapped the cover of iit thoughtfully before moving it aside and grabbing the wrapper closest to him. He moved the other sandwich closer to me, "You didn't have to get me anything to eat. You probably should have ate hours ago. I know you're a growing boy."

He doesn't crack a smile as he unfolds the wrapper with such annoying precision. It makes me swallow hard, so I try again, "You make Sam do all the work while I was gone—"

"Why are you acting like it doesn't bother you?" His voice has a certain edge to it. Like he's mad, but is trying to hold it in because Steve isn't one to show anger. He's never been a hot head. He's a level headed, cool as a cucumber kind of guy.

"Because it does."

He sighs and his shoulders slump just an inch, "Then why-"

"He left me a long time ago Steve. He just didn't take his things until yesterday. And like some fool...some stupid little girl- I thought he loved me. We started to build this life together after everything...and now...I'm back to where I started. And I believed it all...like it was a fairy tale. Like we had this miraculous second chance at love. So stupid. I'm angry at myself and I'm angry with him. I'm just...angry."

Steve plays with the wrapper of his sandwich for a moment and then asks quietly, "You still love him?"

I smile sadly and feel my eyes swell with hot tears as I look away, "I always will. How can I not?"

The pity that fills his eyes is unbearable and my own tears fall. He pulls me close and hugs me. In the back of my mind, a little voice edges its way through as Steve whispers 'It will be okay' and it almost, almost drowns out his voice in my ear. Almost. I hear Clint's voice clear as day and it makes me cry even harder.

 ** _"Of course I love you...always."_**

You liar.

:::::


	4. Chapter 4

:::::

TWO WEEKS LATER

I'm sitting in front of the television watching some sappy movie on Hallmark while eating my third serving of strawberry jello when Steve comes in the front door. He has a weird obsession with jello and it's always in the fridge. I, of course, showed him the canned whipped cream that I had stashed in the back behind my two bottles of wine. So, at the moment, his snacks include jello and canned whipped cream. I keep telling him his stomach is getting soft and now he spends an extra twenty minutes at the gym doing cardio.

I look up and he's watching me, eyebrow raised and the corner of his mouth raised. My eyes grow a bit and I say around the mouth full of jello, "What?"

He shakes his head as he sets his bag down and toes his shoes off. He looks to have showered at the gym. He sits down beside me and takes my bowl, "Whatcha watchin'?"

"Hey." I reach for it and he shoves a hearty spoonful in his mouth. "Hallmark channel."

I look down at the almost empty bowl and huff before I just grab the can of whipped cream. He looks perplexed for a moment and then nods, "Oh…this one…yea…he gets the girl."

I laugh at the thought of Steve watching the Hallmark channel, but settle myself into the pillows beside me. Drawing my feet up underneath me I give a shrug, "They always get the girl."

He props his feet up on the coffee table as I send another blast of whipped cream in my mouth. He sets the bowl off to the side and grabs his book that he start this morning. My phone buzzes and I reach for it. It's Tony, of course. He's giving me updated information on the Hydra situation and his plans to take them down. I don't answer and toss the phone back on to the coffee table.

"Tony?"

"Yep," I say blandly, but pop the 'P' at the end.

"He sent me a message. Wants to know an answer soon." He flips the page and I flop over onto my side before placing the can on the table in front of me. The main characters on the tv are kissing now. Smiles on their faces as they swap spit and tell each other that they love one another and want to live happily ever after in an unrealistic world. I snatch the remote up and turn it to my previous channel. I'm met with Rambo slitting a guy's throat. I look over at Steve and he's deep into the Jack Reacher novel. I sigh heavily.

"Maybe we should take him up on the offer. You're driving me crazy. The lawn is mowed perfectly, roof is fixed, bedrooms are repainted, and you've alphabetized my bookshelf…twice."

He sighs, "You said vacation. This is what I do on vacation."

"People go to the beach when they are on vacation."

"I'm not going to the beach."

"Come on," I sit up and cross my legs. He closes his book with a tired sigh. "It will be fun. We can get you one of those star spangled speedos. You will be the talk of all the girls."

He rubs his eyes with a groan, "Marcy…"

I grin, "We can invite Sam too." I pause for a second and give a dreamy sigh, "I bet he looks great in a speedo."

He looks at me then. He face is…unreadable. He gives a forced laugh then and puts his book back on the end table. "No. Maybe next year…still have to lose my jello weight."

I laugh as I follow him to the kitchen. He sets the bowl in the sink and I place the can in the fridge, "I think your jello belly looks fine. I just enjoy teasing you. And you know, I can get a bikini to match. We can be like the three musketeers."

I turn and smile at him. His eyes fly up to my face and his cheeks redden. He laughs a bit and shakes his head, "We'll see. I'm gonna go take a shower then head to bed."

I start to open my mouth about the shower, but stop as he eyes flitter over me and then he turns away quickly. I feel my heart beat faster. I knew that _look_. I saw it on Clint's face often and it was usually before we tumbled in bed together. Maybe we needed to take Tony up on his offer. We've just been too cooped up in the house. I head back to the couch and sit there a moment before picking up my phone and opening my messages. My eyes immediately land on Clint's name. I still have the messages he sent. The preview still shows the last message he sent me.

" **I stopped at the house yesterday and picked up my things. I'm not coming home Marcy and I'm sorry for not telling you sooner. So, when we see each other next- I think we need to talk about some things."**

I bite my lip as I stare at the messages. I shut my eyes and take a deep breath. I can hear Steve's voice in the back of my mind, _'When are you going to delete them?' Shrugging, 'They remind me not to get close anymore.'_

The look on his face…the hurt when I said those words was still burned in my mind. I didn't mean him. Steve was a friend, my best friend in fact. I just didn't invite anyone to live with me. The slow nod he gave me and the _'hmm'_ of disapproval or was that disappointment? I looked back down at the screen and hit delete quicker than I could change my mind.

A buzzing drew my attention to the coffee table. Steve's phone. I hadn't even noticed he placed it there when he sat down. I glanced at the clock on the wall, 11pm. I switched off the tv, I wasn't really interested in watching Rambo anyways. I grabbed his phone, made my rounds to lock the doors, and then switched off the lights. I picked up my romance novel from the bar and headed upstairs. The only books that Steve couldn't get himself into were my romance novels…which were usually too explicit and somewhat trashy. He read a few short paragraphs one time and closed it with a hard thwack. His face was red and he kept clearing his throat. I heard him whisper to Sam that the books were worse than pornographic magazines he used to look at. Sam laughed and said that he needed to get him some updated versions. He looked confused. I tried to ignore the way he clutched the manila envelope that was pretty thick and was postmarked from Sam. His cheeks tinged pink and he excused himself to his room saying he was tired. That was about three days after he moved in.

His door was open just a crack and I didn't hear the shower running, so I continued to my destination. I gave a knock on the door before pushing it open. Steve was sitting in a chair, feet propped up on the bed, sketchbook on his lap, pencil in hand. His hair looked darker, so I guessed he had taken a shower. He only had briefs on which answered my question of that. I cleared my throat, "Sorry for intruding. You forgot your phone."

I stepped closer and he turned the sketchpad over before I could see. He smiled, "Thanks."

"Night."

I started to leave and he spoke, "Hey…um…you know, if-if you wanted to see Sam. It wouldn't bother me."

I cocked my head at that and gave a small chuckle, "Is this because of my speedo joke because…you were included in that too, you know?"

He looked down momentarily while he swallowed and then bypassed my sentence entirely, "I think he'd be good to you. Good for you."

I just nodded not knowing what to say, so I changed the subject, "I'm gonna tell Tony that we're in. If you wanna get back out there…Captain."

I smiled then and he gave a firm nod, "Affirmative. Sergeant."

:::::

THREE WEEKS LATER

We found ourselves at Avengers Tower sitting in a room with Tony, Bruce, and Thor. I was pleasantly surprised to see him actually. He looked good and had just came from seeing Jane, so that could have been a cause. Natasha came in then looking refreshed as she sat a bunch of files down.

"This is it?" Tony asked disapprovingly. The stack was already a foot and half tall and he really just asked if that was it? Seriously? Was he that desperate to get back into the fight?

"Nope. Got the rest."

My heart sped up and I looked down at the metal table. My leg started to bounce up and down nervously. I wasn't ready for this. A large hand slid onto my knee and griped it. I met Steve's eyes and he gave a slight nod.

"Good to see you two in one piece," Steve said plainly.

Tony agreed readily, "Yea…fell off the grid there didn't you?"

Clint was the first to speak, "It was nice to get away."

Steve shrugged noncommittally, "I agree. It was a nice vacation. Except for the hard labor I was forced to do."

I looked at Steve and laughed before shaking my head at him, "I thought you enjoyed it."

Tony hummed then and clapped his hands together, "Alright. Back to Hydra."

Bruce clicked something on his laptop and a list with about a hundred names popped up, "This is what we've been able to track down the last few weeks."

"This many got away?" I shake my head disapprovingly.

Steve sighed heavily, "Hydra was heavily set into SHIELD…I wouldn't be surprised if there was even more."

His hand left my knee to grab a file that Natasha was sliding down. Clint sat down next to me, "I dug more into a few of these names and they are associated with known major crimes in the US and overseas."

Tony scoffed, "SHIELD's mess and leave it to the Avengers to clean up the mess."

Thor gave a nod of approval, "If SHIELD had given Asgard proper ownership of the Scepter, and part of this problem would have been solved."

Wait, wait, wait. "What? Hydra has the Scepter?"

"It's missing," Bruce said with a sigh. Tony nodded, "That's pretty much the whole point of this pow wow today. Thor brought it to our attention and now we are going to get it back. It needs to go back to his world. Where it belongs…"

Tony and Thor's eyes met. Expressions on their faces like they had already had this discussion in private and it may have been tense. I cleared my throat, "So…Avengers. We are working under ourselves now? Can we do that?"

"If the world wants to be saved…they'll let us," Tony said sardonically.

I held my hands up, "I just want to make sure we are doing the right thing here."

Clint looked at me, "Who else is there to do this? We are it. Clean up the mess and as far as I'm concerned…retirement looks good."

"Retirement? Are you serious?" He told me almost nine months ago that he'd be a lifer. What in the hell had actually happened the last five months.

Natasha continued the conversation ignoring my outburst, "We need to start as soon as possible. We leave tomorrow morning for the first mission. May be a long day, so I suggest everyone get plenty of rest." She turned her attention toward Steve, "If that is agreeable with the Captain?"

He gave a silent but firm nod. His hand hung loosely over his mouth. He drew in a slow breath, "First stop on the map…factory in the Northern Philippines. 0600."

He tossed the file to Tony. I noticed the number 1 in bold letters across the front then. I looked back to the stack of folders. They were all numbered. Holy hell. This may very well be the longest service of my 'superhero' career…ever.

Tony stood and announced rather pompously, "Dinner will be served at 7pm. Surf n' Turf menu with an excellent wine and beer choice, if I may say so myself. Celebrate all the children coming home to the Tower."

I rolled my eyes, "Only you Tony."

I looked at my watch, about 5 hours. That was enough for nap and shower. Steve was talking lowly with Natasha pointing out things on the map and in the file. He was back into soldier mode. This was his element. I smirked at the thought of his painting the bedrooms at the house though. He was pretty precise in his planning. The perfect tools, laying out the plastic sheeting just right, making the tape lines perfect.

A throat cleared as I turned. I glanced at him and Clint nodded toward the balcony. I drew in a breath and nodded as I followed. As soon as he closed the door and we were alone, "So your vacation was so relaxing, you're planning on retiring now?"

He shoved his hands in his pockets, "I know you're angry."

I laughed bitterly, "Angry…yea…I'm not sure if that's the proper use of the English language."

God, he looked good and I hated it. He looked amazing. The bags missing from under his eyes, his skin looked tan, he even looked a bit more…fit. He looked off into the distance and then back at me, "I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

"Any of what?"

He paused for a moment almost unsure and then he calmly said, "I can't say."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Upon my outburst, behind him I saw Natasha and Steve's heads pop up. Guess the balcony doors weren't sound proof after all. "You leave in the middle of the night almost five months ago and then you don't contact me hardly…at all."

"Marcy-"

"Then you just out of the blue send me a text saying that you've already packed up and moved on. Is that all I was to you?"

"No-"

"You left me once in the desert- you can leave me again, right, is that it?"

His eyes turned dark and he stepped forward. His finger flew up and pointed it directly in my face. _Aw, I offended him._ Steve and Natasha both stood straighter on the other side of the glass. I ignored them- this was between Clint and me to solve, "This was not the same thing. You know it."

I shook my head and said the one thing that I knew would hurt him the most, "No, it is. You're still the _same_ coward."

His jaw clenched at that and he lowered his voice, "Don't tell me you aren't happy I'm out of the way so you screw the stars and stripes in there."

My hand flew up to cheek so fast that I didn't even know I was doing it until he stepped back. I stared at him for a brief second and paused as I stepped around him, "How dare you. I loved you and only you."

I shoved the door open and left him there. I briefly met Natasha and Steve's eyes. Bruce was edging his way out of the door to the hall. I hadn't noticed him before. I shook my head as I grabbed my phone knowing that I had just let our shit air in front of part of the team. It was embarrassing enough to find out this way, but to be compromised like this before such an important mission.

I tried not to stomp off in the direction of the elevator, but I was angry, so I was _mildly_ stomping. Natasha called after me, "Marcy- wait."

I turned slightly and shook my head before backing up, "I can't do this."

"Marcy…come on…" Natasha tried and I shook my head again. Steve was too occupied watching Clint who had yet to turn around.

"No." Steve met my eyes then. I shook my head, "No, I don't think I can do this."

::::::

I took a deep breath as the wind made my hair blow around my face. I missed the city, the sound mostly, the feeling of being alone, but not quite exactly. I sipped my glass of wine. I was only on my 2nd bottle and I could finally feel the warming effect humming through my body. I honestly just loved the taste of wine something about it that could relax me. I smiled when the next track came over the IPOD that I had plugged up to the speaker system. I had a mixture of music, but the big band stuff was Steve's doing.

I leaned against the wall and sighed. Was Clint right? _No._ He couldn't have been. I loved Clint. This whole entire experience between us had been given to us for a second chance. Maybe it was just that though…a chance. Chances weren't always rewarded with a positive outcome.

"You missed dinner…so I brought you a plate."

I spun and was feet away from Steve. I clutched my chest. I hadn't heard him come in, "Don't do that. I could have set you a blaze."

He laughed and leaned on the wall next to me overlooking the lights of the city. He seemed extra broody tonight, the deep pools of blue catching the light from the city, "I have to ask Marcy."

I sigh and already know- the mission, "I'll be ready to go tomorrow Captain. No problems from me."

I gave a mock solute before he looked at me seriously then, his eyes narrowing, "I don't doubt your commitment to your obligation. I mean…the reason why…"

"It's not important," I downed the rest of the wine and set it firmly on the table behind us. Captain Wonderful, always wanting to protect me with his chivalrous side. I could tell it was eating him alive to know what exactly Clint had said to make me lose it like I had. He looked me over. I actually was dressed for dinner. I had a shimmery dress on and my hair was actually curled for once. I looked at him then and he smiled, "What?"

I looked down and he laughed, "You look nice. You should have come to dinner."

"Yea, yea." I crossed my arms and looked over the city, "I was busy."

He took in a breath and held out his hand before he cleared his throat, "Care for a dance?"

I raised an eyebrow, "A dance?"

"Too good of a song to go to waste."

I looked down at his hand and then noticed another slow song had started playing. I gave a tiny smile and reached out. He spun me around and I landed very hard and ungracefully against his chest. I sucked in air before I swallowed the lump in my throat which then plummeted to my stomach. I whispered merely inches away from his face, "I'm not all that great really."

He gave his head a little tilt, the corner of his lips tilting up as he moved us slowly but assuredly to the soft beat of the horn medley, "I've actually taken some lessons…so I think I can lead pretty well."

Lessons, hm? "Then I'll just follow your lead."

His eyes darkened a shade as his gaze dropped down to my lips and god help, my lips parted as I took in a breath. His lips were everything that I thought they'd be. They were soft and warm moving against mine. His tongue brushed the outside of my mouth and I let him in. I let out a moan as I wrapped my arms around his neck, his chest pressed hard against mine. I could feel my nipples grow painfully hard and I was suddenly aware of how moist it was between my legs. We hit the glass balcony door and his lips moved down my neck where he sucked and bit down gently, but hard enough to make me whimper. My nails scratched over his back as he pulled at the skirt of my dress.

"Oh god…Steve…"

He growled and I felt the wind hit my thighs. My dress bunched around my waist, he hauled me up and pinned me against the door. I linked my ankles together around his waist and as I felt his fingers pull my lace thong off completely. I sucked in a breath just as he gave my right nipple a tiny tweak. I hummed in pleasure.

"I want you so bad. I can be better than him Marcy. Let me better to you."

"Steve." I moaned as he kissed me again and his fingers entered me. My eyes shut tightly. I was already so close to coming apart in his hand. His breath was hot on my neck. He bucked up and I could feel him against me. I wanted him inside me, but I couldn't make my arms move to his belt. They felt like stone. His pace quickened and I cried out as I felt my body clench. I shuddered against him and called out his name, "Steve."

I opened my eyes and startled. It was Clint…not Steve. I jerked and set up fully awake then at the sound of my name being called.

"Marcy."

I looked up at Steve and he looked a bit uncomfortable as he shifted from his place at the balcony door. I looked back down at the chair that I had been laying on. I must have fallen asleep out here. Taking a slow breath and could feel the heat on my cheeks. That delicious feeling of needed to be touched and satiated was still there. If I could just squeeze my legs tighter, could I get there? _Stop. Steve is right there watching you, moron._ I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples. _It was a dream, it was just a dream, get over yourself._ My eyes flew back to him as I tried to calm myself. At this moment, I give anything for him to finish me off. No, it was a _dream_. Steve was _finger fucking_ you against the door…the one he's standing at now and it was a dream. _Had he heard me…oh god…please tell me I wasn't moaning._

I heard the IPOD change to a modern song. In my dream it was a big band song that had been playing.

"Marcy, are…you okay?" He swallowed and I watched his Adam's apple bob up and down. I cleared my throat and nodded, probably too enthusiastically.

"Just dreaming. I'm…I was just dreaming."

He licked his lips and looked down at his watch, "I was going to walk you to dinner…if you wanted to go."

There was a slight flush in his cheeks and I squeezed my legs together tightly, "Sure. Let me just freshen up."

"Okay." We didn't move for a beat and then he moved out of the door. I let out a breath and stood up. Maybe I could just skip dinner and fix the problem myself. Not having sex for almost six months was clearly getting to me. Steve was over at the IPOD looking at the listing when I walked into my apartment. I darted to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. Even though I was pretty sure I hadn't be 'roughed' up…I looked it. I took my hair and brought it to a low side pony tail and reapplied some lip gloss.

When I emerged from the bathroom, I paused. The song in my dream was playing. Steve's back was to me, "I'm stealing your music now…a lot better than your books."

He laughed and stopped the music before turning around. He gave a gentle smile, "You look beautiful by the way."

I froze. My eyes shifted to his light green dress shirt and black slacks. The sleeves were half rolled up and his muscles in his forearms were….I smiled then. _Down girl. He's your best friend. One sex dream and you are acting like a teenager._ "Thank you. So do you. Handsome, I mean."

He looked down seeming to have relaxed some, "Well, this is probably the most I've dressed up in the past month."

There was a twinkle in his eye and I shrugged as I stood next to him and flipped the device off. He held out his elbow and I took it. My fingertips burned at the skin on skin contact. I shrugged, "I'm just hoping you can still fit into your saving the world suit."

"Ha. Ha."

As we laughed together, I couldn't help but noticed that his cheeks were still tinged pink. The elevator doors shut and he was chewing on his lip just a bit.

"You okay?"

He nodded and cleared his throat, "You know…I meant to ask. Am I the only Steve you know?"

I looked up at him and saw the hint of a smile. Swallowing as I looked back at the shiny metal surface of the elevator, I prayed it would move faster. I didn't answer his question and he didn't ask again.

:::::


	5. Chapter 5

6 months later

:::::::::

"God it's noisy out here." I heard Cap chuckle in my ear monitor. I gripped the strap in between his shield and suit to stabilize myself as I used my free hand to send fire bolts into the army that Strucker had sent out to us.

"Sorry princess," Clint shot out sarcastically.

"Children…focus," Nat said as she thrusted a long knife into the guy beside her.

"Yes mother. Thor, gonna need some momentum," I said letting go of Cap's straps and using the flame to thrust myself up into the air. Thor grasped at my ammo straps and we took to the sky. The strategy was one that Thor had worked up a few months ago. He asked if I can fly and I said I hover really. So, he made it his mission to hoist me into the air when possible. It's really a longer more entertaining story when you're drunk actually.

"Gained some weight, have you?" Thor said with a slight grin to his voice. I continued to concentrate rolling my hands in tight balls before I thrust my hands out shooting multi indigo orbs in the men below.

"A gentleman never inquires a ladies weight Thor." At that moment, we descended quite fast to the watch tower. I went full flame as soon as Thor let go. I landed on top of a man and he crumpled to the platform as I spun and grabbed another man. He let out a pain filled cry filled the man as I held his arm at an unnatural angle until I heard the satisfying crunch. Kicking him off the tower I joined him at the bottom in the blood and dirt tinged soil.

"Shit!" Stark bellowed.

"Language! Jarvis, what's the view from upstairs?"

Thor was on the ground throwing loose pieces of metal at the mercenaries as I shot them with long bolts of flame. Five were closing in suddenly and held the handle of his hammer. Gripping it tightly he swung me around in a circle taking out two before I broke off into a spinning arch and hovered over the snow. The other three were taken out by his hammer and it spun back to his hand.

" _The central building is protected by some kind of energy shield. Strucker's technology is well beyond any other Hydra base we've taken."_

I turned to Thor and smiled, "Loki's scepter must be here."

He met my face with relief and a smirk, "Strucker couldn't mount this defense without it. At long last."

"At long last is lasting a little long, boys….and girl."

Static crackled through my ear piece as the flame shrank down around me. Clint's voice echoed, "Yea…I think we lost the element of surprise."

"Wait a second. No one else is going to deal with the fact that Cap just said "language?"

"I know." Steve smashed the brakes on his motorcycling causing it to flip and he hurled it over his head. There goes the fourth one, I thought with a roll of my eyes. "It just slipped out."

As Thor and I near our fight toward Cap, more shots rang out in the background followed by Nat's voice full of concern for Clint. I stretch around Thor to get a good view of what's going when suddenly Cap was shoved into me. Dancing backwards, I caught myself on a tree and looked around, "What the hell?"

"We have enhanced in the field," Steve said as he searched for the entity.

"Guys! Clint's hit!" Nat rushed out. Her voice felt more frantic than usual.

The soldiers were back on us in seconds and we were forced back into combat momentarily drowning out Natasha's request to deal with the bunker. A hard kick landed me flat on my ass, the wind gone from my lungs, my eyes staring up into the googles of a soldier. He heaved his spear in the air and I tried to focus my energy into my hands, but couldn't muster the strength against gasping for air. A flash of metal appeared and the man was gone.

"Stark, we are really needing to get inside."

I rolled to my side and Thor grabbed my arm pulling me to my feet. He turned to Cap, "The enhanced?"

"He's a blur. All the new players we've faced, I've never seen this. In fact, I still haven't."

"Are you alright Marcy?" I had my hands on my knees for a split second longer than necessary. I waved him off. I nodded, "I'm good to go."

"Clint's not. He's hit pretty bad. We're gonna need evac."

Thor turned back to Cap, "I can get Barton to the jet. The sooner we're gone the better. You and Stark secure the scepter."

"Copy that," he gave me a nod as I cracked my knuckles and returned the nod. Moving to Steve's side I paused.

"Oh hey, look…they're lining up." I chuckled.

"Well their excited." I pressed my back to Steve's as he braced himself against the shield before Thor hit the metal with his hammer. The shock wave sent out enough force to shove them back and collapse their remount.

"I love that," I smiled broadly. Steve shook his head and looked at Thor.

"Find the scepter," he looked at Steve and fly away. I watched for a moment and then turned back toward the fight which had practically ceased.

"And for gosh sake, watch your language!"

I laughed as Steve let out a long sigh, hands on his hips as he shook his head, "That's not going away anytime soon."

"You go help Stark. I'll hang back with Nat."

He took off jogging toward the structure where Strucker and the rest of his goons were hiding. Nat ambled over rubbing a snowball in her gloved hands. It was practically scarlet. She saw my gaze, "He's okay. He's stable for now."

"Looks like we are locked down here," I said to Cap as Nat and I finished our check around our sectors.

"Copy. Nat, get to Banner, time for a lullaby."

::::

I stripped off my gloves as I made my way to Clint's side, "You doin' okay?"

"At least it wasn't my face…that's my feature, right?" He smiled through the pain and lifted his fist, "Good work out there princess."

I gave a nod before I bumped his fist with my own, "You too."

I left him to himself and walked over to stare of the scepter, "So this is it."

Thor hummed beside me, "Yes…this is a very powerful source of energy. It' not suited for Earth."

"No, arguments here."

Natasha turned slightly, "Thor, report on the Hulk?"

He stepped forward with a bright look, "The gates of Hell are filled with screams of his victims."

Bruce groaned and lowered his head into his hands. I pinched the backside of his bicep that was visible and he turned slightly. He took note of the glare that Nat drove at him and he cleared his throat, "Uh, but, not the screams of the dead, of course. No no uh…wounded screams, mainly whimpering, a great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids and, uh….and gout."

"Just stop," I whispered. I glanced back at Steve and he staring at the ceiling trying not to laugh. He wasn't any help. He cleared his throat once more and turned his attention back to the scepter. "Really? You're supposed to cheer him up…not send him Hulk mode."

He was about to say something and Tony approached, "It feels good, yeah? I mean, you've been after this thing since SHIELD collapsed. Not that I haven't enjoyed our little raiding parties, but…"

He crossed his arms, "No, no, but this….this brings it to a close."

At those words, I felt my stomach drop in disappoint. We were about to disband again. Despite the bruises, cuts, and sore muscles…I've enjoyed myself these past 6 months. Steve sighed, "As soon as we find out what else this has been used for. I don't mean just weapons. Since when is Strucker capable of human enhancement?"

Stark rubbed his face and agreed, "Banner and I'll give it the once over before it goes back to Asgard. If that's cool with you?"

"Of course."

Stark continued, "I mean, just a few days until the farewell party. You're staying right?"

Thor briefly glanced at all of us, "Yes, yes, of course. A victory should be honored with revels."

"Yeah. Who doesn't love revels? And what say you Cap? Marcy?"

"I could use a good revel." Thor grinned at that and Steve nodded, "Hopefully this puts an end to the Chitauri and HYDRA, so… Yes, revels."

::::

I had been here only ten minutes and already had two drinks in. Tony's parties weren't bad, but it was a lot of bullshit in one room. I mean, seriously, how many more egos could you fit in here? Hill slid in next to me, "Your dress….is amazing. Trying to get someone's attention there Sergeant?"

I turned slightly and looked over the crowd before meeting Steve's eyes. He turned away taking a swig of his beer before lining his shot up at the pool table. I looked back at Maria and shrugged, "I'm not sure he'd get the picture."

She sighed before taking a sip of her champagne, "You and me both sister."

I stared at her wide eyed, "Oh my god…tell me who…now."

The blush crept into her cheeks as Rhodes, Thor, and Stark made their way toward us. I eyed her and gave a laugh before shaking my head. My money was on Rhodes.

"Well, you know, the suit can take the weight, right? So I take the tank, fly it right up to the General's palace, drop it at his feet, I'm like "Boom! You looking for this?" Stark and Thor just stared at him and I covered my mouth with my hand to hide the smile…and giggle threatening to spill out. Rhodes look astounded, "'Boom! Are looking…' Why do I even talk to you guys? Everywhere else that story kills."

"That's the whole story?" Thor said with an expectant look.

"Yeah, it's a War Machine story."

Thor grinned, "Well, it's very good then. Very impressive."

Rhodes shakes his head, "Yea, quality save there. So, no Pepper? She's not coming?"

"No." Stark shrugged trying to seem unmoved by the question.

And that was the way you shut down a conversation. Maria turned to Thor, "Hey, what about Jane? Where are the ladies gentlemen?"

"She's good. She's fine. She has a company to run."

Thor took a large drink from his glass as we waited for him to give the whereabouts of Jane. I nudged Maria in the side and shook my head. She whispered 'what?' and then Tony opened his mouth.

"She's probably busy…not as busy as my Pepper. But…"

"Tony," I scolded. Thor shook his head and sighed, "We are taking what you humans call 'a break'."

"Oh," Maria said quietly. "Thor, I'm sorry I brought her up."

The truth of the matter was Jane had found someone else. Apparently, she couldn't handle the whole long distance Asgardian relationship like she had proposed in the beginning. It broke Thor's heart, but he was doing better.

His blue eyes flittered to me and I smiled gently. Stark cleared his throat, "Alright….I'm…going over there."

Maria and Rhodes started whispering to one another and then suddenly walked away. My mouth fell open, "Son of a bitch…."

"What?"

I grabbed the sleeve of his jacket, "That is who she was talking about. The little sneaks."

"I'm still not following your manner."

I pulled his arm down and until his head was level with me, "She and Rhodes. They are a couple. She totally tried to throw me off. I knew it."

Thor laughed, "Your intuition is undeniable. They are indeed."

I found myself wishing that Steve would notice me in that way. Rhodes was making Hill laugh, her face bright and let out a slow breath. I blinked a few times before I heard Thor clear his throat. I moved away and let go of the fabric on his arm. I forgot that I had even been holding it. My fingers ached from the death grip I had on him. Thor stood straighter squaring his shoulders. "I'm sorry about that."

He grabbed another beer from behind the bar and leaned against it thoughtfully, "Would you like to talk about it?"

I looked at him stunned for a moment, "I…no. Not really, but I appreciate you offering."

"You've listened to me drone on about Jane for hours on end. It's healthy to reflect."

"You are stealing my lines now."

Bruce walked up from the middle of nowhere then, "Hey guys, there is a drinking game going on with the veterans over there…it looks…well, it looks super fun." _Super fun? Wow…okay Bruce._ We both looked to the corner and saw Steve motioning us or just Thor, I really couldn't tell. He nodded at Bruce and bowed his head toward me before he met my eyes once again, "If you will excuse me…I see my expertise is needed."

I smiled politely before he backed away barely missing Natasha. He gave a small chuckle and walked straight to Steve who was intently watching Thor. Steve's eyes found mine at that moment and he blinked before turning to face the older men waiting for a show.

Bruce was staring at the bottles in front of him. His fingers drummed on the bar to the beat of the music. Natasha gave me a nod before rounding the bar. I poured my almost to the brim of whiskey and then headed upstairs to the sofas.

At this point, I was practically invisible to him. He hadn't even said two words to me since I had arrived. Why? I had no idea. Maybe something I had done? We were fine a day ago…I think.

:::


	6. Chapter 6

:::

Our small team were the only ones at the 'after party' as Tony called it. I was more than sure that I had drank too much whiskey. I was on my second bottle and Steve pushed the flask from Thor over towards me. I let a few drops fall into the glass then closed it and tossed it back. That stuff had a kick start to alcohol that I needed. I took a large sip and winced. I snuggled down into the pillows and met Steve's gaze over my tumbler. His twitched into a tiny smirk. I was giddy and relaxed. I was blaming it on the mead, but I felt his eyes burn into me for a moment. Not angrily…but hot. I shivered. He must have loosened up because he was suddenly paying more attention to me. Not that I was complaining…but with no attention all night and then bam! Yea, confused city. Without a word, he stood and picked up his coat beside him. He draped it over my shoulders quietly and returned to his seat. _What is happening? What the actual fuck is happening?_

I felt my breath quicken as I smelled his cologne. I needed to chill the freak out.I glanced at him thoughtfully as I brought my drink to my lips again. His gaze was hooked on me and I swear, for a split second, the color of his eyes darkened. He quickly turned his attention back to the bickering Tony and Clint about Thor's hammer that had been placed on the table in the middle of all of us. It was the mead that we were drinking.

"But, it's a trick!"

I forced my mind on the conversation trying to regain my composure. Thor suddenly laughed, "Oh, no. It's much more than that."

"Uh, right man, 'whosoever be he worthy shall haveth the power!' Whatever man…it's a trick!"

I snorted into my drink and started coughing. Thor shrugged, "Well please, by my guest."

Clint sat shocked for a second, "Really?"

"Yea." We all laughed as Clint stood, his drum sticks long forgotten.

"Oh this is gonna be beautiful." Rhodes bumped Tony's shoulder. He agreed, "Clint, you've had a tough week, we won't hold it against you if you can't get it up."

I leaned around Clint so I could see. He shook his head as he looked directly at Thor, "You know I've seen this before, right?" He pulled with a grunt and nothing happened. He laughed whole heartedly and scratched his head, "I still don't know how you do it."

"Smell the silent judgment?" Stark teased.

Clint held out an inviting hand, "Please, Stark, by all means."

In Tony Stark fashion, he stood confidently and unbuttoned his jacket with a slow pop. _That man and his ego are too much for a room sometimes._ "Oh, here we go…"

"I'm never one to shrink from an honest challenge."

"Well, jump on it then!" Clint spurred.

"It's pure physics," Stark said as he grabbed the hammer. Bruce hollered out, 'Physics Tony! He paused and glanced to Thor, "So right…if I lift it, I…then rule Asgard?"

"Yes, yes of course," Thor said with a serious light tone.

Tony nods confidently, "I will be re-instituting Prima Nocta."

I rolled my eyes and let out a very lady like snort, "You would Tony."

He pulled and pulled and stopped, "I'll be right back."

Natasha laughed, "Where...? Wait…he's going to get his suit. Wow."

"How does his head fit into that helmet?" Natasha leaned over for a fist bump. We laughed and then Rhodes took off after Tony. "Oh good grief…now he's going too."

Tony strutted up to the hammer again with his left sleeve of armor. He pulled and tugged until his face was red. I took another long drink of the amber liquid and set glass aside pulling Steve's coat closer as I slipped off my heels and tucked my feet under me. _'Miz well settle in for a good show of testosterone.'_ I glanced at Steve and he was watching me, his mouth covered with his hand as he tried to hide the smile against Tony's antics. He turned his attention back to Rhodes joining Tony with his right sleeve of armor. Both men started pulling at the same time, but grunting.

"Are you even pulling?"

Stark looked up at him, his face red and taken back, "Are you on my team?"

Rhodes was exasperated, "Just represent! Pull!"

"Alright, let's go!"

Laughter chorused through the lounge as both men turned bright red. I sat up a little a patted Tony on the back, "Okay gentlemen…we are reaching stroke limits."

Tony cursed and he pointed a finger in Thor's direction, "One day Point Break….one day."

Bruce stood, "I'll give it a go. Why not, right? I mean, Hulk is the strongest Avenger."

"Thems' fightin' words boy," I drawled out in a slang. Bruce prepared himself, grabbed the handle, and pulled. Suddenly, realizing that he wasn't going to lift it, he roared and waved his hands in the air. We all stared. No broke a smile except Natasha.

"Huh? No?" Natasha smiled softly and him before he went back to his seat across from her.

"Awkward," Stark coughed. "Let's go, Steve, no pressure."

He chuckled, "Alright."

Everyone cheered his name. I had to remind myself to watch and not ogle at his ass in my face. Steve started pulling and…it freaking moved. Not a lot, but just enough that I noticed. I shot a look at Thor and he had lost him smile. Steve stopped and shook his head. Thor let out a breathy laugh of relief. He taunted, "Nothing."

"And?" Stark held out his hands to me and Natasha. I shrugged standing up, I let Steve's coat drop to the chair and cracked my knuckles, "Since Rhodey and Tony got an advantage…."

I rubbed my fingertips against my palms and blue flame sparkled to life and crawled up my arms. It was silent for a moment as I grabbed the hammer's handle with one hand and pulled. It wouldn't budge. I placed my free hand behind my right one and I closed my eyes as I pulled. I could hear the high pitched screech of the heavy metal moving on the glass top. My eyes shot open and it stopped. My flame snuffed out with a swift wind. I looked at Thor and he visibly swallowed. I think Steve too as he sat up a bit straighter. He glanced at Thor and then back at the hammer.

I rubbed my hands on my dress, "I think Steve loosened it up."

Tony pointed, "Now…that…was trick. You weren't supposed to help her Thor."

Thor laughed when he sensed the tension and everyone laughed. I quickly grabbed my drink and tossed the remainder down before I sat down. I slipped on my heels. It was about time to go.

"Widow?"

Nat looked at me and then Thor, "Oh, no no. That's not a question I need answered."

Thor rubbed his chin as Stark made his closing argument, "All deference to the man who wouldn't be king, but it's rigged."

"You bet your ass!"

Maria pointed at Clint, "Steve, he said a bad language word."

Steve sighed, "Did you tell everyone about that?"

Tony ignored him, "The handle's imprinted, right? Like a security code. 'Whosoever is carrying Thor's fingerprints' is, I think, the literal translation?"

Thor stood taking a deep breath, "Yes, well that's, uh, that's a very, very interesting theory. I have a simpler one." I grinned and shook my head knowing what he was about to do as he lifted the hammer off the table and flipped it effortlessly. I kicked him lightly in a teasing manner. He looked down at me with a smirk and then back up as he scoffed. "You're all not worthy."

A loud pitched screech filled the room and I covered my ears, "What is that?"

It faded slowly as another sound took its place, a deep voice, "Worthy…No…How could you be worthy? You're all killers."

I moved into place beside Thor. It looked like one of Tony's Legionnaires.

"Stark." Steve said sternly. He shook his head trying to contact Jarvis about rebooting this system. The bot stumbled around as if he was confused. I stepped forward as Natasha stood up and Thor grabbed my wrist and gave a quick shake of his head.

"I'm sorry I was I asleep ...or I was a dream..? There was a terrible noise…and I was tangled in…in…strings. I had to kill the other guy. And he was a good guy."

"You killed someone?"

I met Maria's eyes and gave her a nod as she began to arm herself. The one time I put on a dress and high heels there might be a fight.

"Wouldn't have been my first call. But, down in the real world we're faced with ugly choices."

"Who sent you?" Thor called.

Tony's voice filled the room as he played a recording, "I see a suit of armor around the world."

Bruce looked in horror at Tony, "Ultron."

I looked to Tony for confirmation and he looked too stunned to compute what was going on. I slowly toed off my shoes and moved to stand by Steve.

"In the flesh. Or, no not yet. Not this…chrysalis. But I'm ready. I'm on a mission."

"What mission?" I called.

"Peace in our time."

Four Iron Legions busted through the walls behind him. I couldn't get my flame up fast enough before Steve kicked up the table blocking the pulses charge aimed at us. We were both sent over the back of the couch onto the ground in a tangle of limbs, "Oh god…that hurt."

He touched my back giving me a quick once over before rushing back toward the sofas. I rushed to get up going full flame instantly. I threw a rod of fire into the first legionnaire I saw and it collapsed. Steve was on the back of one riding it around when it crunched him into a wall. I headed up the stairs just in time to miss the next charge by inches. I thrusted the flame toward the bot just as he sent another pulse. I was thrown back over the railing and hit the glass hard. It gave way and I fell into the walk way below.

"Thor!" Steve called and then all of the sound stopped. Either we were all dead or…well I felt pretty dead. I rolled to my side and groaned.

"That was dramatic! I'm sorry, I know you mean well. You just didn't think it through. You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change. How is humanity saved if it's not allowed to…evolve?" I looked up and met Clint's eyes. He held his hand out for me to steady myself. I heard metal crunch and the tin canned asshole finished his speech then. "With these? These puppets? There's only one path to peace…the Avengers' extinction."

I heard the metal echo of Thor and knew it was all clear. I pushed myself to my knees. Clint moved closer to the window, "You alright princess?"

I held up a middle finger and stood wincing at the pain in my foot along with other areas, "I'm gonna just start wearing my uniform everywhere."

Clint snorted, "Hang on…comin' to help."

:::

After everything that we fought…Tony goes and builds a robot that wants to kill us. I thought, like really thought, that I was going to get to go back to my house in Georgia and enjoy some R&R, maybe catch up on some reading. _No. Nope._ All because Tony and Bruce decided they wanted to screw with Loki's Scepter. I rubbed the bridge of my nose feeling the headache building behind my eyes. Thor had gone on the search for a Legionnaire and Steve looked like he was about to combust. I looked sadly down at my dress, the many rips that it had accumulated and sighed. I really liked this dress. I pulled Steve's coat back on over my arms feeling a few of the cuts sting.

Bruce paced, "All our work is gone. Ultron cleared out, used the internet as an escape hatch."

Steve's ears were tinted red now and he shook his head, "Ultron."

Nat crossed her arms, a zip up hoodie on now. How was it that she looked perfect and I looked like I had been in a car accident? "He's been in everything. Files, surveillance. Probably knows more about us than we know about each other."

I glanced at her. Rhodes looked twitchy, "Files, yea. What if he goes for something…more exciting? Hm?"

"Nuclear codes," Hill perked. Rhodes agreed and pulled out his phone. "We need to put everyone on high alert for a…. _virus_."

I crossed my arms, "Well, he did say he wanted us dead…so…that should do it."

"Not dead. Extinct." I met Steve's eyes at that. _Extinct._ That was more than hatred that this Ultron harbored. I glanced at Tony and let it sink in that this robot was taking after Tony…kind of.

"Let's not forget the fact that he said he killed somebody," standing a bit straighter. Hill shook her head and stopped the process of digging glass out of her foot. I was there and done. Bandages wrapped around my feet.

"No one was in the building."

Tony finally spoke as he stepped forward throwing a 3-D image of Jarvis' consciousness into the middle of the room for us all to see. Bruce stepped up shaking his head, "Oh no…this…this is insane."

"Jarvis was the first line of defense. He would've shut Ultron down. It makes sense."

Bruce bit his lip, "No..no….Ultron could've assimilated Jarvis. This….this is rage."

We are silent for a beat almost like we are giving Jarvis the honor he deserves at a funeral because in all sense…Jarvis was dead. Thor stomped through suddenly, his face hard as stone and I swear I heard a growl before he grabbed Tony at the throat and shoved him back into the wall. Stark grunted hard.

"It's going around," Clint said coming down the stairs.

Tony grabbed his arm and ground out, "Come on buddy…use your words."

Thor looked pissed in fact…I don't think I had ever seen him like this, "Oh I have more than enough words to describe you, Stark."

"Thor!" Steve shouted aggressively, "The Legionnaire."

Thor dropped Tony back to the ground and sent a silent glare back to Tony, "Trail went cold about a hundred miles out but it's headed north, and it has the scepter. Now we have to retrieve it….again."

"I just don't get it Tony," I said easing off the table. "You built this program. And now…it's trying to kill us and you look…."

He started laughing…almost mad man like. Banner clears his throat and subtly shakes his head, "Not…not the best time man."

"You think this is funny?" Thor stepped toward him again. Tony looked shocked as he searched all of our faces.

"Don't look at me like that."

"This could've been avoided if you hadn't played with something you don't understand."

"No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry…it's funny because you don't get it."

"We are supposed to better than SHIELD Tony!" I exclaimed. "You should have asked us…we are a team."

"You don't get it. You weren't even there. You don't know what it means to see these creatures come through a wormhole and destroy everything! You're just here as an afterthought." I shook my head and clenched my fists as he continued, "A hostile alien army came charging through a hole in space. Here we are using sticks to defeat a giant. What if we could have something better….something bigger to poke back?"

"You are such a fucking asshole. I don't _know_? I've been here with you all fighting everything that you do. How dare you say that I don't understand?"

"It's because of people like you that I have to make things like this! You are the one that is naive here!"

Steve boomed, "That's enough. Besides...Marcy's right. We are a team. We do this together."

Stark shook his head, "You won't win….we…we won't win."

Steve looked solemn for a moment, "Then we lose...together."

Stark walks back to his tinker toys at the table and I linger by Thor a moment too long before going back to my corner beside Clint. I lean against the railing as Steve gives out commands to make the world smaller and find Ultron. How do you find something that can ride any open connection out there?


	7. Chapter 7

I would be lying if I said that I was okay. After Stark's dig at me yesterday…I felt off. Just more confirmation that I don't belong here. Retirement was looking better and better. I was beginning to feel mildly useful now like I helped this team, but maybe I was wrong. I respected Stark and his opinion. He was a smart man and had been doing this superhero thing for a bit longer than me. Here I set though, sulking on the couch looking through incident reports and sighting warnings on Ultron on the tablet that Natasha had given me. She was going through the computer trying to find traces of him. I say him…Ultron seems like a 'he'. I glanced up from my research, Bruce was on a computer of his own while Thor was standing near the window gazing out in deep thought. We hadn't had much time to talk here lately, so I could only imagine what he was feeling. I'm sure he was happy to finally be going home and now that's ruined. Clint's phone rang then and he stepped out into the hall.

"I hope one of you are finding something substantial. All I've managed to find is zip."

"He's going to be really good at hiding…assuming he can wipe himself from the internet. There is probably proof out there, but we just can't see it." Natasha sighed before stretching her arms out over her head with a muffled yawn.

"I still can't believe this is happening."

Bruce swiveled in his chair, "I already feel partly responsible for this…don't make me feel worse."

"No…that's not what I meant. It's…it's like this is Tony's Jekyll to his Hyde, you know?"

"Well, that…is a great analogy of myself and I will say that I deserve that." Tony said as he walked in with a large cup of his morning green 'go-go' juice. I stared at him for a moment and then shifted my gaze down to the tablet again. I was going to ignore him. If I ignore him, would he go away?

"Look fireball," I sighed at the nickname and realized he wasn't going away. Tony stood near the couch and shoved his hand in his pocket as he used the other to swirl what left in the cup, "I said some things that were…not nice."

"That's an easy way of putting it."

"Shitty?"

I sat the tablet down beside me and crossed my arms as I raised my eyebrows at him, "You were wrong."

"I was. I am…still. I don't want to be the diva who breaks the team up because of my demeanor which as you know can be…abrasive at times."

"And yet, here you are just dancing around the fact that you are an arrogant asshole who thinks he's better than anyone else."

Thor glanced over his shoulder at me. I stood and rubbed the bridge of my nose. My headache was still there from last night and I was tired…a bit sore. But I needed to focus and not be such a bitch. Tony was trying to apologize in his own weird narcissistic way.

"Apology accepted. Just don't insult me again….don't belittle me in front of our team. Because I will singe your eyebrows off in a split second next time."

"Noted." He gave a swift nod as he held out a fist. I stared at it for two seconds before bumping it with my own. Steve entered then his eyes fell on us. He lifted his eyebrows in question and I gave a sure nod. Was Steve the one who goaded him into issuing an apology?

"We got something." Thor met Steve almost at the doorway and stared at the tablet before shoving it into Tony's chest. His face was stony and he crossed his arms firmly. Clearly Thor had not forgiven him just yet.

Tony grappled for the tablet before he dropped it, "What's this?"

"A Message. UItron killed Strucker." Shocked I met Steve's eerily calm face. He shook his head at me ever so slightly. The longer I studied his face I noticed it wasn't calm, but exhaustion.

"And he did a Banksy at the crime scene, just for us."

I peered between Tony and Thor as I shook my head, "No…this doesn't make any since. He just gave his big speech last night…why would he be sending us this message?"

"I agree, Strucker knew something that Ultron didn't want us to know," Thor mused aloud.

Natasha sighed, "Anddddd…yep. Everything we had on Strucker has been erased."

"Figures," I said flatly as I retreated back to the couch.

Tony smiled and shook his head then, "Actually….not everything. We still have all of the hard copies of our files from beginning of mission 6 months ago."

An hour and two pots of coffee later…

Files and papers were strewn on the table that Steve and Thor had brought in. We were all elbows deep in boxes and folders. I tossed another folder back into the 'done' bin and pulled a ponytail holder from my back jeans pocket.

"This is like looking for a needle in a haystack," I said grimly as I pulled my hair into a ponytail.

"Actually…" Steve began, "Known associates. Just found it."

I moved to stand next to him, "Damn…lot of friends."

Tony then said something that made my stomach turn slightly as Steve was flipping through pictures, "Wait…wait. I know that guy."

"What?" I said confused, "This guy?"

"From back in the day. He operates off the African coast, black market arms." Steve cocked his head slightly with an accusing, disappointed look as Tony continued, "Don't get your undies in a bunch. There are conventions, alright? You meet people- not like I ever sold him anything. Although…I remember him talking about finding something new. It was what he called a game changer, it was all very 'Ahab' really."

I pulled out another picture of him, "Ulysses Klaue."

Thor pushed closer to me as he pointed to the man's neck, "This."

Tony looked confused for a moment, "Uh…it's a tattoo. I don't think he had it when…"

"No, no. Those are tattoos…but this…is a brand."

Bruce was already typing away on the computer. "Yea…it's a word in an African dialect meaning thief, in a much less friendly way." Bruce spoke up from his computer.

"What dialect?" Steve spoke as he set the rest of the files down.

"Um…Wakanada…? No. Wa…Wa…Wakanda."

Tony looked at Steve suddenly, "If this guy got out of Wakanda with some of their trade goods…"

Steve looked surprised, "I thought your father said he got the last of it?"

I shook my head as I crossed my arms, "Whoa…whoa…I'm not following. What comes out of Wakanda? Isn't that a third world country?"

"The strongest metal on Earth," Tony answered as he pointed over his shoulder at Steve's shield. I felt my eyes widen. What if there was more? Steve chewed his lip thoughtfully, "We need to make a move on him. Suit up. Wheels up in thirty."

We all nodded in confirmation and headed in the direction of the stairs. I glanced at Clint and then fell into step beside him. I gave him a nudge, "You okay?"

"Yea…just a few things on my mind."

"You want to talk about it?" We were in the back of the line and he slowed down even more. He shrugged.

"Just got a call is all." Steve turned and gave a paused look. I gave a tiny smile and nodded before he looked between us and then headed down the stairs to catch up with the team.  
Clint touched my elbow lightly causing me to stop walking completely. "What's that all about?"

"What are you talking about?" I looked at the space that Steve had occupied and then straight into those eyes I knew well.

Clint chuckled, "Come on Marc'. I know that look. You forget I've known you for a while."

"You're trying to change the subject Barton."

He drew in a long breath and shoved his hands into his jacket pockets, "Secret for a secret."

"What are we, five? I don't have any secrets. You?"

"I was talking to my… _significant other_."

I squinted my eyes taking him for a long moment. Why the hell couldn't he just girlfriend like a normal person? But I knew who he was referring to, it was _her_ , the one he left me for. At least I knew he was happy…Nat had told me in so many words. I nodded, "She misses you."

"And she's _worried_ about me. I was supposed to be home this morning." _Home_. I swallowed. I asked. I asked if he was okay. This was us trying to continue our friendship further. I _was_ trying. "And…I thought you said you weren't hung up on Cap."

"I never said if I was or wasn't. You were the one who accused me, remember?"

He nodded and checked his watch before looking back at me, "I want you to be happy Marcy. I always have. No matter who the man is beside you. You deserve to be happy."

"I want the same for you too," I said quietly. I started to walk down the stairs and then stopped before turning back to him slightly, "Maybe….maybe one day…I could meet her? I mean she's a part of your life and we are friends, right?"

He smirked, "Yea, we are. And I'd like that."

Walking onto the Quinjet, I was still zipping and buttoning up my uniform. My belt was slung over my arm. I had made Clint and I run late, but I felt that it needed to be said. Clint and I had a history, but the history didn't have to affect our relationship now. I was trying to be adult about the situation. I took a seat next to Steve and he studied me for a long second.

"You good to go?"

"Yea…yea. Sorry for the delay."

Tony began taking off and Steve cleared his throat, "I meant to tell you last night. The dress was very pretty. Just got caught up I guess."

"Oh…you mean the killer bot threw you off your game?"

He laughed, "Yea. Among other things I think."

"Like?"

He swallowed and side glanced once more, "I think I'm losing my focus."

He looked older at that moment. Troubled really. I drew in a breath and clucked my tongue against the roof of my mouth. I nodded firmly and spoke in a quiet voice, "You think I'm the reason."

He looked at me startled, "What? No. No, if anything…you keep me grounded most days. Just feeling…"

I waited for him to continue, but he didn't. I reached for his hand and squeezed it, "It's okay. When you are ready to tell me…you can come to me…anytime."

He gave a grateful smile and then headed up to pilots seat to talk with Tony. I stood and wrapped my utility belt around my waist and buckled the additional strap on my leg that held my side arm. My gaze drifted over the team and I felt something strange. Worry for them. I've never felt worried for my team. They were all capable and more than qualified to do their jobs right.

"Marcy, Thor…let's go over the plan," Natasha called from the imaging desk in the center of the jet. We moved over and I settled myself in beside Steve waiting for his orders.

"Stark, Thor, and myself will engage first. Natasha, Clint, and Marcy will be on the top decks in the main arena here waiting for a signal. Banner will be our ground point in the jet."

Stark came up beside Thor, "Sounds good. He shouldn't be that hard to bring in…he's one guy."

Steve nodded, "Always prepare for the worst. Don't underestimate anything at this point."

Stark hummed in agreement. I touched the screen, "Entry points here and here….there. I'll take the one to the far left. Stealth is key. Do we have an idea of this guy's security or his goons…whatever you want to call them?"

Clint scratched his chin, "Flying blind."

"Oh good. I love surprises," I said sarcastically.

Natasha crossed her arms as she continued to study the schematics of the ship's interior, "How long until arrival?"

Stark glanced back at the computers in the cockpit, "Two hours."

"Long enough for a power nap," Clint quipped. I snorted at that. I don't think I would be taking any naps on our trek there. I was still feeling too nervous about this mission.

It was quiet. No one spoke except for Stark. He was conversing with Hill about what to do. Clint was flying the Quinjet to where….I wasn't sure. I wasn't sure I cared. The raid didn't go down as we thought it would. We boarded only to find Ultron there cutting off Klaue's arm in an argument. Everything went to hell after that. Robots were there…four…maybe five. I can't remember exactly the number. The men with the guns…we took them out though. That was the easiest part. Then we spotted them there. The _twins_ that Steve had shown us photos of. _'Hill said he's fast, she's weird.'_ That wasn't exactly an accurate description of the two.

My mind flashed back to the dream like state I was in. I wasn't sure how long, but it was enough to knock me down on my ass. She knocked all of us on our asses. Tony retrieved the Hulk, but with serious causalities.

" **You'll burn everything around you."** I swallowed heavily at the voice echoing in my head. **"You don't deserve any of this Marcy."**

I looked up and I was there again. **My house stood before me and I clutched my suitcase tightly. My fingers began to ache as I stepped onto the porch and into the open front door. Toys strewn everywhere. Blurry pictures decorated the walls of what look like a family. I blinked hard as I saw myself dancing with a blond haired boy in the living room. He was standing on my feet as we danced to some big band song that I couldn't place although I had heard it before.**

" **You're home!" My eyes shot to the kitchen and Steve was standing there. He was wearing a tight blue shirt, jeans, and he was barefooted. He looked handsome. I smiled brightly. He tossed the kitchen towel onto his shoulder and hollered, "Mom's home. Come say hi kids!"**

 **The same blond haired boy ran from the kitchen followed by a brown hair girl that was older. My heart skipped a beat. I felt myself sink to my knees as I saw their faces. I gasped, they were covered in scars…from old burns. I covered my mouth as tears poured from my eyes. Did…had I done this?**

" **What's the matter Mommy?" The little girl's blue eyes welled with unshed tears. I looked up at Steve as he came closer…his face marred by the same horror.**

" **You don't remember do you Marc? Doing this to us?"**

" **N-no. Steve…I didn't…I would never…"**

 **Everything changed then and we were all sitting at the dinner table playing cards, "Go fish dad!"**

 **The little girl giggled. The scars were gone…on all of them. They all looked so happy. The little boy looked a lot like Steve. It was surreal. Steve grabbed my hand suddenly in the mists of the laughter from little voices.**

" **You'll burn everything around you," he smiled wickedly as he raised my hand to his lips.**

 **I turned away from him and found myself standing at the double doors in the kitchen. There was patio furniture that was singed on the ends. The yard looked burnt in patches were the kids were playing. My hand flew to my chest as the screams echoed through the backyard, but the kids were on the swings playing. They were playing. They were having fun. They waved and I waved back. Steve wrapped his arms around me from behind as he kissed my neck. I felt peace in that moment. I relaxed into him for a moment. We were laughing then and then Steve whispered in my ear, "You don't deserve any of this Marcy."**

I jerked as a hand touched my arm. It was Steve. He looked concerned, "You okay?"

I moved away quickly and he looked shocked as I continued to back away, "No…no…no."

"Marcy, are you okay?" He eased forward with his hand out. I looked down at it and swore I saw a ring. A wedding ring. Was this real? I blinked and shook my head hard. It was gone….no ring. He continued to advance slowly toward me.

"Stay the fuck away from me!" That made him freeze. Everyone turned and watched me. They were judging me. They knew I was going to lose it one day. They all _knew._ He visibly swallowed and clenched his jaw. He held up his hands and backed away slowly. His eyes glistened. He nodded and gave a throaty, "Okay. Okay."

" **You don't deserve any of this Marcy."**

I could still hear his laughter in my ear. The laughter of the children. The screams…I slunk into the corner furthest away from Steve. I wiped tears away as I stared at the metal wall of the jet.

" **You'll burn everything around you."**

" **You'll burn everything around you."**

" **You'll burn everything around you."**


	8. Chapter 8

After I had regained a miniscule amount of my sanity, I moved to a seat thirty minutes before Clint landed us in a field. I kept glancing at Steve. He hadn't looked up from his hands in two hours. He hadn't spoke, even when Tony handed him a bottle of water. He grunted in response. I knew now that my reaction had been an overreaction, but I swear, it was real. It felt real…to me. I would have to apologize to Steve. I had never acted like that toward him…ever. Mine and Steve's relationship was a pretty easy one. To think that I may have just screwed it all to hell made my stomach churn.

The farmhouse was quite large, dingy, but still beautiful. It seemed so peaceful out here. The wind and a few neighs from horses caught my attention. I sat longer than necessary in the seat before standing. Then when I stood, I looked over at Steve. He glanced away quickly. I felt my heart sink at that. Clint appeared beside and squeezed my shoulder. He gave me a deep stare before I looked over at Nat, who was covered in sweat and looking more like a skittish cat than a red headed bombshell of a spy. I met his gaze again and he whispered, "It will be okay."

Despite our history, our rapport was tighter than ever. We were always good partners and were solid supporters to one another. I looked down the ramp at Steve. He was standing with his hands on his belt, eyes squarely on the ground, but he head was turned toward us.

"I…I…" Clint nodded in understanding that I couldn't continue.

"I understand…better than anyone. But you are strong. Always have been and you are gonna beat this bitch out of your head. Got it?"

I nodded, "Yut. Improvise, adapt, and overcome."

"That's right. Now get your ass down the ramp Marine."

I smirked and gave a nod as he walked down the ramp. Tony, Bruce, and Thor fell into step behind. I paused at the bottom of the ramp. Steve shot a glance at me and then continued after Thor. I shot out and grabbed his hand. He turned sideways giving me a gaze full of pain and confusion, "Can we….can we maybe talk in privately later?"

He searched my face and breathed out a 'Yea'. I dropped my hand and headed off toward our team. It was all I could do right now.

"What is this place?" Thor asked gripping his hammer tightly in his fist. Tony raised an eyebrow, "Apparently a safe house?"

Clint smiled at all of us, "Here's to hopin'."

He opened the door and stepped in like he belonged. Nat headed out in front of him and turned to the right. Clint then hollered, 'Honey, I'm home.'

I stopped abruptly and Steve bumped into me. I felt the heat pull away as fast as I had came. An extremely pregnant, beautiful brown haired woman rounded the corner, "This is Laura."

She smiled, "I know who all of you are. Clint sent a text saying he was bringing you all. I hope you will be comfortable here for a while."

Clint pressed a kiss into her hair just as two kids ran through, "Clint!"

"Hey guys!" He dropped to one knee and accepted them into wide ready arms. "How you guys doing? You been good?"

They chatted with smiles and I tuned out at that point. I stood in the foyer hoping to disappear. This is what Clint wanted from me. I would have happily gave it all to him. Steve stood beside me and looked just as confused.

"Did you bring Auntie Nat?"

I shifted my eyes to Natasha. She brightened out of her stupor, "Why don't you hug her and find out?"

The little girl rushed forward and threw herself into Natasha's arms. I leaned against the door post in the foyer just outside of the living area.

"Sorry for barging in on you," Steve said politely. He looked displaced. Eyes shifting around the room, stopping on artwork on the walls and photos of Laura and her kids. I gnawed on my lip keeping silent.

Tony gave a humorous chuckle, "Yea, we are a bit surprised because we knew nothing about you." He looked at me and raised an eyebrow, "You didn't know? You're being awfully quiet there James."

I gave a tender smile and shook my head no, "Well, we appreciate the kindness."

Clint looked down at the woman tucked into his side, "Her husband and I were partners for a long time with SHIELD. He…he was killed on assignment. I've kept in touch and visited often. Nat worked with us for a while, so we ended up being an extended family. Laura and I just…grew closer."

He smiled down lovingly at her and I smiled sadly at the floor. Natasha started gushing over Laura's pregnant belly then and seemed mildly surprised the baby was a boy. I startled as Thor rushed passed me, his shoulder knocking me back to the wall. Steve followed him quickly, "Thor."

I moved closer to the open door and crossed my arms watching the two. Thor turned quickly and laid a heavy star on Steve, "I saw something in that dream. I need answers, I won't find them here."

With that and the spin of his hammer, Thor lifted into the sky leaving Steve standing there dumbfounded. He sighed heavily and turned toward the farmhouse steps and froze. His eyes were directly on me, but they were close. A sadness swept across his face as kids giggled in behind me. He swallowed hard and turned heading back toward the Quinjet. I was about to go after him and a voice behind me made me pause.

"It's nice to finally meet you. Clint has told me a lot about you." I turned ever so slightly finding Laura standing in the foyer, hands on her belly. I smirked and reminded myself to be nice. I held my hand out, "Marcy James."

She took it firmly, "Laura Barton."

The name cause me to pause but only for a second or two, "Wish I could say the same."

Laura's hands were back on her swollen belly and she shrugged, "Fury did us a favor, helped me and Michael practically disappear when we started having kids. It's not on SHIELDS list, so we were safe when Nat released SHIELD to the world."

"That's really good…really kind of Fury."

"He's been good to my family especially after Michael was killed."

I nodded as the awkward silence fell on us. She blew out a breath as she came closer, "I…I just want you to know…he loved you. He did. Really. It's just that we had been toying with this for a while and it just clicked this time and…"

I held up a hand, "I'm good on the details. I'm just happy he's happy."

She smiled in reply and then her eyes drifted to the open door, "Maybe you could be happy too?"

I swallowed at that, "One day."

:::::::::::

He was sitting on the floor of the jet staring at a metal object in his hands when I found him. The top half of his uniform was off, abandoned beside him on his duffel. Mine set next to his. The corner of my lifted a little at that gesture. His eyes met mine before they flittered over me and then back down the…pocket watch? I sat down beside him and noticed it wasn't a pocket watch, but a compass…with a picture of Peggy next to it. He cleared his throat, "She…she kept me going when I was leading troops, invading, and trying to be what the country needed."

"Deacon was like that for me, you know? Growing up together and then joining the Marines together. He…I loved him." Steve looked up at me with the saddest look. I shrugged, "We had chances…several in fact. He was just….we were never in the right spot at the right time. And then he was gone suddenly."

"Do you think that's how she felt?"

Letting out a slow breath, I shook my head, "Coming from a woman's perspective…yes. Being someone who's been left behind…it's the worst feeling in the world. You move on though. Granted, that person never leaves your heart or your soul, but eventually it gets better."

"It's hard to have a conversation with her…her Alzheimer's doesn't really help. She's just back and forth, you know? But learning, after I was gone, that she had a great life. That she fell in love and had kids. She's been happy over the years. That made me feel better about things. That she had a loving home. Even if it wasn't provided by me."

I nodded and crossed my legs, leaning my elbows onto my knees, "You wanna talk about your dream?"

He sniffed, "War was over. There was a huge party in a ballroom, dancing and all smiles, booze. Peggy…she told me that we could go home. 'Just imagine it,' she said. Then everything just disappeared and there was no one there. Everyone was gone. It made me realize that I don't have a home, not really. I'm just a soldier who can never go home."

I took his hand and held it firmly, "As long as you're my best friend, you will always have a home."

Squeezing my hand tightly, he brushed away some stray tears from his face with his free hand, "Thank you Marcy. That means a lot."

It was silent between us for a long while after that. I felt honored that he was comfortable enough to cry in front of me. Steve was a tough guy on the outside, but inside…super soldier or not, he was just struggling with our new found reality- just like the rest of us. With that thought in mind, the courage bubbled in my chest. I looked down at our intertwined hands, "I owe you an apology…for what I said when you were only trying to help me. You and I…are not like that together. We aren't cruel to one another and toxic. And I don't want to ever become that way with you."

His nod was slow and the encouraging squeeze of his hand was brief, but he sat patiently waiting. I had given him the option of divulging his secrets and now he was giving me the chance. I decided to leave out the detail about Steve being the husband in the dream for now, "I arrived home, my house in Georgia…door wide open, the laughter of children filling the air. It was so beautiful. Kinda like what Clint has here. There were two kids and…a husband. As they got closer, I realized that their faces were marred with burn scars. And yo….he said to me that I did it. I did that to them. I can still hear screams of pain mixed in with their laughter and his voice telling me, 'You'll burn everything around you'. And the worst…'You don't deserve any of this Marcy'. He was right. I can't have a home filled with the laughter of kids when I could possibly end it all with my hands."

I glanced over at him and there were hard lines were deep in his forehead. His face tired and he shook his head. I knew he didn't understand the connection. The reason why I had flipped out on him. I inhaled deeply before revealing the secret, "It was you. You were the husband in the dream. When I imagined it again…I just flipped…because your voice…"

"I would never say that to you," he said quietly. He let go of my hand and rubbed his face hard as he shook his head, "God…Marcy….I would…I would never treat you that way. You know that right?"

I stared at him in silence. I gave a slight nod and looked down at my hands with disgust, "What if the dream comes true? Not…not…but I mean…what if I can never have any of this?"

I gestured toward the farm house and it greatness. Feeling my heart sink at the realization that Steve and I were quite a pair. We both felt like we could never have a home. Maybe that is why we were drawn to one another. Even if nothing ever romantically spurred between us- his friendship was beyond enough. His fingers ghosted the side of my face, callouses on his fingers making me lean into his hand. I turned to face him and the pad of his thumb swept over my cheek as a tear fell. His voice low, blue eyes dark, his eyebrows close together as he studied my face, "You can have it all. You deserve to have it all…and more. You could never hurt those that you love Marcy."

I cupped his hand that held my cheek and nestled into it again, "I wish we were on the couch at home eating jello and watching Hallmark together."

He snorted as made an 'ehh' and gave a deep laugh, "Maybe the History Channel…"

He pulled me into him and I adjusted my legs as I melted into his side. We sat like that for a while listening to the wind rustle the fields outside. He picked up the compass once again and shut it, the click of the lock echoing through the jet, "How are you doing with Clint's new found family?"

I looked up at him and his eyes seemed to twinkle in the light. I shrugged, "I'm good. Everything happens for a reason right?"

"Yea," he whispered before he pulled me closer and kissed my forehead. He cleared his throat, "We, uh, we probably need to head back. We need a shower."

"Together?" I said teasingly, but his cheeks grew several shades of pink and he began stuttering. I laughed and nudged him in the ribs. "Don't worry…I'm joking. Besides…I expect a date or two before that happens."

His eyes widened and he nodded before smiling. His mischievous broke through, his eyes seemed to darken faintly and then he shook his head looking down, "You always know how to lighten the mood."

I just stared at him with a tiny smile on my face and then wrapped my arms around him. His arms instantly engulfed me. I brushed my lips against his ear and I felt him shiver into me, "Only with you Steve."


	9. Chapter 9

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

I tried not to stare from my position at the picnic table, but watching Clint with the young boy was mesmerizing. I don't think I had ever seen him this way with a child. Come to think of it, I had never even seen him with a child. He looked so calm, so at ease in this environment. I looked back at the farmhouse and a tiny smile crept onto my face, but I quickly let it fall. I looked back at Steve who was splitting wood across from Tony. Did Steve want this life too? Why am I even stressing over it? We weren't even together…but there was something…

"Thor didn't say where he was going for answers?"

My eyes shifted from Steve then to Tony and back to the father/son pair on the porch. We were all pretty tense and I could feel the tension coming off of Steve in waves.

"Sometimes my teammates don't tell me things. I was kind of hoping Thor would be the exception."

I felt a tiny dig at myself and then took a piece of ice out of my glass of lemonade. I had told Steve, but not before screaming at him like a crazy person. I let the ice hit the table and then let a ring of flame engulf it. I lifted my finger as the flame caused the ice cube to glisten, but not melt. I twirled my finger until the flame was spinning like a sphere within a sphere while protecting the ice.

"Yea give him time. We don't what the Maximoff kid showed him."

"'Earth's Mightiest Heroes'. Pulled us apart like cotton candy," Steve scoffed before I heard another thwack of the axe against wood. I sighed as turned my palm to the sky and shoved the sphere six inches higher.

"Seems like you walked away all right."

I glanced at Tony then at Steve and rolled my eyes. Here lately Tony and Steve had been like a couple of Rams. What was done…was done. I let the outer sphere rotate left and the inner rotate to the right causing the ice cube spin so fast it glittered like a diamond.

"Is that a problem?" Steve seemed aspirated, but slightly uncomfortable at the suggestion that he wasn't affected like the rest of us had been. Steve was a lot tougher than Tony gave him credit for.

"Can you two just shut up? Put your damn dicks away." Tony scoffed just as Steve's scolding stare turned on me. "I'm tired of hearing about this."

"You know Ultron is trying to tear us apart, right?"

Steve's glare turned back toward Tony, "Well, I guess you'd know. Whether you tell us is a bit of a question."

"Banner and I were doing research!"

I felt my eyes burn and I snapped my hand into a fist causing the sphere to close in on itself. Dozens of tiny pieces of ice hit the table with tiny tinks. I shook my head and inhaled as Steve continued the argument.

"That would affect the team."

Tony raised his voice, "That would end the team. Isn't that mission? Isn't that the 'why' we fight, so we can end the fight, so we get to go home?"

At that moment, Steve pulled apart the log he was holding. I stood slowly and watched him closely. I knew that this wasn't mainly about Tony keeping secrets, but the fact that Steve believed he didn't have a home to return to after the battle was over. Tony didn't even know a hint of what he saw in his dream. He didn't know the affect it was having on him.

"Every time someone tries to win a war before it starts, innocent people die Tony. Every time."

I opened my mouth to speak, but Laura Barton did that for me, "I'm sorry. Mr Stark, uh, Clint said you wouldn't mind, but…our tractor doesn't seem to wanna start at all. I thought maybe you might-"

I glanced over at Clint and he briefly meets my gaze with a slight nod. I bit my lip and turned my stare back to the tense men.

"Yea, sure. I'll give her a kick."

He turned to leave and then pointed back at the pile he had been slowly adding to, "Don't take from my pile Rogers."

Tony headed off to the barn and Laura gave a nod before she left Steve and me alone. I sighed heavily, "You okay?"

He gripped the axe handle and pulled back swinging it down once again. He didn't say anything. I shoved my hands into my pockets and looked around us, "You should take a break."

Nothing. He chopped another piece.

"Maybe we can go for a walk. Let you get your mind off things."

Nothing. He was on his fourth now. His pace had picked up considerably.

"Steve." He said nothing, he wasn't even acknowledging my presence now. I watched him for a few minutes longer as he chopped and chopped and chopped relentlessly. He was just a man, super soldier or not, he was just a man that had emotional trauma. We all had. We were all a family now. No matter how torn we were…are? He grabbed another log and set it down. Just as he lifted the axe to chop, I threw a ball of energy toward it and it flew off the stump about six feet away from us.

He dropped the axe to his side and growled, "Marcy…"

I stepped toward him and grabbed his face, bringing down his lips against mine. He stilled from shock for a split second before he dropped the axe onto the ground and wrapped his arms around me tightly pulling me closer to him. His mouth moving slowly against mine, but I could feel the need…the passion behind it. I pulled back and his dark blue eyes searched my face. I rubbed my thumb over his lips softly, "You have a home."

His jaw tensed as he rested his forehead against mine. I heard him swallow thickly, "If we don't do something about Ultron, we both won't have a home."

"Then let's do something about it."

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The sounds of children laughing in the family room directly next to the kitchen was uplifting to the heart. I watched the girl giggle as she ran to Nat. She was really good with her. I pushed what was left of the apple pie around on my plate while Fury and Tony went on about the nuclear codes. The biggest worry right now was Ultron getting his metal paws into the country's, hell, the world's defense systems. The little pigtailed girl appeared at my side with a shy grin as she handed me a sheet of white construction paper with my best guess of what a peony looked like to a child. The petals were a teal color with the stem being blue. I smiled at her and gave her a side hug, "Thank you sweetie. It's beautiful."

"The color is supposed to be your eyes," she said softly. Large brown eyes glittering in the kitchen light.

"I think…it's the perfect likeness."

She grinned brightly at my compliment and then ran toward Clint. I followed her with my eyes until they drifted up to meet Steve's. He was watching me with a quirk resting on his lips. His very full lips that I kissed only a few hours ago. I felt my cheeks pink slightly as the thought made my stomach flip flop.

"Well, this is good times, boss, but I was kind of hoping when I saw you, you'd have more than that," Nat looked exhausted for a brief second. I looked back at Fury. I think I had just missed a vital moment in the conversation.

"I do, I have you." Fury looked at all of us like this was his amazing contribution. I'm pretty sure our faces reflected our thoughts, "Back in the day, I had eyes everywhere, ears everywhere else. Here we all are, back on earth, with nothing but our wit, and our will to save the world. So stand. Outwit the platinum bastard."

"Steve doesn't like that kind of talk." I snorted at Natasha's comment.

"You know what Romanoff?" The look she gave him was…priceless. I chuckled as I shoved the rest of my pie away. Time to stop drowning my worries in calories.

"So….what does he want?" Fury continued. Like a doting pupil, Steve answered first, "To become better. Better than us. He keeps building bodies."

"Person bodies. The human form is inefficient, biologically speaking, we're outmoded. But he keeps coming back to it." Tony shook his head as he pulled darts away from the board only to have a dart whiz past him. I look behind me to Clint and he shrugged with an unapologetic smile.

"Well, I have to say…you and Banner seriously defaulted in programming him to protect the human race," I commented casually as I rested my chin in my palm. Looking Banner over as he studied the butterfly drawing that the girl had given Nat. He shook his head as he pointed at the drawing.

"Humans don't need protection, they need to evolve. Ultron's going to evolve."

I scrunched my eyebrows, "Like Terminator evolve?"

"I think it's much worse than that. Has anyone spoken with Helen Cho? She has the ability…"

Tony fully stepped into the kitchen, "To create a form. Son of a bitch."

I stood up and took a last swig of sweet tea and snapped my fingers quickly before picking up the construction paper. I was definitely keeping this memento as a memory of this place. I doubted would like to return soon. Nothing against Laura and her kids, but…it was just a reminder of what Clint wanted with her and not me. Steve drew in a breath, "We need to suit up. We have some work to do."

Leaving the kitchen, I headed down the hall to the guest room where we each took turns taking showers. Footsteps echoed behind me and I already knew it was Steve. He closed the door as he followed me in. I folded the paper and shoved it into my bag. I pulled off the baggy sweater revealing just a gray tank top underneath. I had forgotten that I wasn't wearing a bra. I had taken off my sports bra before showering and decided to forgo it since the sweater was very forgiving. Steve quietly ducked into the bathroom and I took the time as an opportunity to put on a clean sports bra. I shoved the top back into my bag and pulled the bra out just as Steve came out wiping his hands on a towel. He froze in the door frame and gripped the towel tighter until his knuckles bled of color. His eyes were dark, his lips were parted, and he swallowed….hard. I felt my chest rise and fall with quick breaths that did not help the heat pulling in my stomach. Suddenly his eyes jumped up to meet mine and he spun around quickly.

"I-I'm sorry. I didn't think…"

"It's…okay. Just give me a minute."

I slipped the bra over my head and glanced at him, his head was turned to the side and I was sure he was looking on purpose now. I wanted to drag this out longer, give him an up close view, but the mission. We had a mission to go on. I quickly shoved my pants off and changed into a men's brief style of underwear. Nat may love wearing thongs when she was fighting crime, but I preferred the more comfortable, form fitting, no slip, no wedges kind of cover. "You can turn around and get ready. We are running out of time."

He turned and headed for his suit lying out on the bed. His cheeks and ears were tinted pink with embarrassment, maybe. That tiny smirk on his face told me that he enjoyed the preview, but was still shy about it. He era of life was definitely not fond of the free shows, well, I take that back…the gentlemen's of the 1940's at least. He began to undress and did a quick glance at me, "You're a bit red there James."

"Under such a heated gaze, I have no choice but to be."

He smiled as he pulled his t-shirt off giving me an unabashed look at his toned chest and abs. Dear Steve Rogers was trying and succeeding in being sexy as hell right now. Giving the credit to his 40's background…he was still a man. I laughed, "Now you are just showing off."

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We were all gathered in the foyer. Clint saying his goodbyes. I clutched my duffel to my shoulder tighter as I focused all my energy on this moment. The moment before chaos erupted and we were thrown into a battle. Tony was convinced that this was going to be strictly a recon mission. Apparently he was forgetting our luck here of late.

"Marcy, you are with me, Clint, and Nat."

I gave Steve a firm nod and picked his bag from the foyer heading out the door. He followed closely behind me and took the duffel. The chuckle was evident in his voice, "I can carry my own bag."

"Wouldn't want you to hurt those muscles of yours," I feigned concern as he cracked a smile. At the same moment, I saw the Jet and my smile fell. Steve's mood reflected as he looked on ahead at Nat and Clint talking quietly as they entered the ship. Steve stopped and grabbed my arm bringing me closer to him.

"What-"

I laid my hand on his chest and he paused. I looked down for the briefest of seconds and drew in a breath, "I'm just…the mission capacity is hitting me. How big this is. How much this can go sideways in a split second. You know? "

His face softened and I felt stupid for even bringing it up. I was an Avenger. Should I be showing such weakness at a time like this? He dropped his duffel and his hands were on my face. His lips touched mine with such a fire it seemed to suck all the oxygen from my lungs and then he was gone. He was watching me with such intensity. I drew in a deep breath before I looked at his lips and met his eyes as he pressed forward again. I grabbed for his shield straps and tugged bringing him closer. He stepped flush with my body and his left hand drifted down my back as I parted my lips letting him deeper. God this was….sunshine on a rainy day. The cool breeze on a hot summer's day. The fire on a cold winter's day. This was…such a perfect thing at the wrong time, but I held on as he stole my wit and sanity. Steve Rogers was a fucking torch that was burning me from the inside out. He broke away suddenly and rested his forehead on mine. The world that had disappeared for a moment came rushing back in. The crickets calling, the hum of the Jet, the wind blowing through the tall grass and…Nat, telling us that we could fuck after this mission was over. It's time for the job.

He swallowed dryly and gave her a swift nod, "Coming."

"Already?" I said quietly with a mischievous smile and he groaned at the joke. He shook his head before planting another soft kiss on my mouth. "It was too good of an opportunity."

He laughed as he reached down and grabbed his bag. He started toward the jet but paused before turning back to me, "Does this change anything?"

I cocked my head at him and grasped his free hand tightly, "It changes everything Steve."

His eyes gleamed with a hint of wetness before he turned, our hands laced together as he paced toward the jet quickly. The ramp lifted as soon as we crossed into the belly of the ship. Steve gave my hand one last squeeze before he let go heading directly toward Clint. Natasha appeared at my side and gave a slow whistle, "That was hot."

"Shut up."

The corner of her mouth turned upward and she crossed her arms over her chest, "Just stating the obvious. You and Cap about to get your hammer on before a mission."

"Recon."

"You know a lot better than that Marcy. Recon doesn't exist where the Avengers are concerned."

"Trust me, it's all I can think about right now. How…ominous this all feels right now." I stowed my bag in the compartment above the seating area and glanced at Clint and Steve. Steve was studying a map on the mission table and Clint met my gaze for a split second before turning back to his flying. Was that a 'told you so' look that he just gave me? I bit back a smile with a shake of my head. I would not admit defeat to that man by agreeing with his preconceived notions about Steve and me. Nat joined Steve and I followed on autopilot. I seriously needed to regain focus now. _'Come on James. Mission. Set. Point.'_

"Drop off will be on the roof of U-Gin Genetic Research Labs. I'll go in alone and access the situation. If I need back up, I'll call on Nat first. Marcy, I want you to run point with Clint in the ship. Remember plan for the worst and expect the best."

Nat and I respond with a nod, Clint gives a 'yes sir' from his position at the pilots' seat. Steve looks at each of us calmly, "We don't know exactly what we are going up against. So…recon or not…use whatever force necessary to get back to the team. Understand?" We all nod in agreement. "Good, get some rest and prepare…we have an hour."

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Thanks for reading! Working on the next chapter- hopefully it won't be so long between updates again.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, but Marcy James. :)


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